Archives for August 2021

TRIED & TESTED : SATISFYER PRO 2 REVIEW

Filed Under: HOME, LIFE, LIFESTYLE, SEX & RELATIONSHIPS // August 30, 2021

Welcome to a brand new series here on TMC; Tried & Tested! Today we are bringing you the Satisfyer Pro 2 Review. If you haven’t heard of the Satisfyer Pro, it is a toy that massages the clitoris using pressure waves and tingling pulsations. Basically it is a vacuum for your clit… but better. It features 11 intensity levels and the silicone cap is removable for easy cleaning. It is waterproof which means you can add a little something special to your shower\bath.

THIS POST MANY CONTAIN AFFILIATE LINKS – CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE ABOUT AFFILIATE LINKS*

SATISFYER PRO 2 REVIEW

The toy is rechargeable, meaning you’ll never need to go out to buy batteries. To charge it, you just dock the magnetic charger to the base of the toy and plug it into a USB wall adapter. The white light will flash whilst charging and become steady when it’s done. A full charge takes around 1.5 hours, though the first charge may take up to 8 hours.

I have always been a bullet girl, never really straying from what I knew would get me off. HOWEVER over the past 12 months I have been more and more intrigued by new toys that caught my eye, and one I saw continuous rave reviews for was this one. I umm’d and ahh’d for a while before finally treating myself and boyyyy did I treat myself.

FIRST IMPRESSIONS:

My partner and I used this together the first time and i’m not going to lie, I just couldn’t get to grips with it. It didn’t feel great and took a while to get it in the “right” place. HOWEVER I used it solo a few days later and holy shit balls. Amazing. I think I felt like I had more time to learn how to best use the toy, what setting worked for me ect. The Satisfyer has this incredible ability to engorge the clitoris so it is a lot more sensitive, meaning orgasms are *chef’s kiss*.

Speaking of orgasms.. they come in fast and multiple times.. compared to using my usual vibrator, my clitoris is more able/ready to move onto a second, third, and fourth orgasm. I know right? Amazing. However this being said, I definitely recommend some sort of lube, otherwise it can leave your clit feeling rather sore and sorry for itself.

Lubricant is mainly differentiated between “water-based” and “silicone-based”. Water-based lubricants are easy to use and are suitable to use with condoms, however these lubricants evaporate over time. Silicone-based lubricants are not compatible with some silicone-based products, so you wouldn’t use them with the satisfyer.

NEGATIVES:

The only slight downfall to this toy is that it isn’t the quietest, well.. until you get it in the right spot and then the volume does decrease slightly. Even the buttons have a clicking sound.

I also wish it was kind of… prettier and it’s quite bulky too. My 4 year old asked why I had an ear thermometer on my bedside table.

OVERALL:

Would I recommend this toy? Absolutely. It’s maybe not a great toy for those who are only just branching into the world of clitoral toys but it is incredible for those that are wanting to step up their sex toy game!

Want to give the Satisfyer a go?? Click here to treat yourself*

Have you tried the Satisfyer Pro 2? Are you a sex toy fan?

TMC TALK : TOXIC SHOCK SYNDROME

Filed Under: HOME, LIFE, LIFESTYLE // August 27, 2021

As you know, on TMC we are incredibly passionate about raising awareness and today we want to talk about Toxic Shock Syndrome. In 2019 a lady who works with my Dad lost her 13 year old daughter to TSS. I had vaguely heard of it and kind of knew what it was but since then I have educated myself a lot on the causes, signs and treatments.

WHAT IS TOXIC SHOCK SYNDROME?

Toxic shock syndrome (TSS) is a rare but life-threatening condition caused by bacteria getting into the body and releasing harmful toxins.

It’s often associated with tampon use in young women, but it can affect anyone of any age – including men and children. TSS gets worse very quickly and can be fatal if not treated promptly. But if it’s diagnosed and treated early, most people make a full recovery. – sourced from the NHS website.

WHAT ARE THE CAUSES?

Toxic shock syndrome (TSS) is caused by either staphylococcus or streptococcus bacteria.

This usually lives on the surface of around a third of people’s skin, but if they get deeper into the body they can release toxins that damage tissue and stop organs working.

These things can increase your risk of getting TSS:

using tampons – particularly if you leave them in for longer than recommended or you use “super-absorbent” tampons
using female barrier contraceptives, such as a contraceptive diaphragm or cap
a problem with your skin, such as a cut, burn, boil, insect bite or a wound after surgery
childbirth

WHAT ARE THE SYMPTOMS?

The symptoms of toxic shock syndrome (TSS) start suddenly and get worse quickly. They include:

a high temperature
flu-like symptoms, such as a headache, feeling cold, feeling tired or exhausted, an aching body, a sore throat and a cough
feeling and being sick
diarrhoea
a widespread sunburn-like rash
lips, tongue and the whites of the eyes turning a bright red
dizziness or fainting
difficulty breathing
confusion

Sometimes you may also have a wound on your skin where the bacteria got into your body, but it may not look infected.

WHAT IS THE TREATMENT?

If you have toxic shock syndrome (TSS), you’ll be admitted to hospital and may need to be treated in an intensive care unit.

Treatment for TSS may involve:

antibiotics to treat the infection
in some cases, purified antibodies that have been taken out of donated blood, known as pooled immunoglobulin, may also be given to help your body fight the infection
oxygen to help with breathing
fluids to prevent dehydration and organ damage
medicine to help control blood pressure
dialysis if your kidneys stop functioning
in severe cases, surgery may be needed to remove dead tissue. Rarely, it may be necessary to amputate the affected area

Had you heard of toxic shock syndrome? Did you know any of the causes?

A GUIDE TO CO-PARENTING SUCCESSFULLY

Filed Under: HOME, MOTHERHOOD // August 25, 2021

As if the relationship you thought would last forever isn’t enough for you to come to terms with, you’ve a small human in the middle of it all to consider. Their entire life is about to literally be split in two; two homes, two routines and a whole lot of confusion, so I want to start by reminding you how resilient children really are and that you will all be okay. It’s a really daunting decision to come to, deciding to get a divorce or separating from a long-term partner, in fact it is HUGE. Chances are if you’re married, you’ve built a home together, share bank accounts, pets and you’ve got to figure out how to divide all of those things; except you can’t simply split a child in two, so regardless of any emotions you may be feeling towards your once significant other, you’ve got to learn to put that to one side when the topic of co-parenting comes to the table and here is our guide to co-parenting.

Firstly you’ve both got to be ready to co-parent, if you’ve ended on bad terms this may not be something you feel ready for, in which instance I would suggest reading up on parallel parenting. Being co-parents means being a team, both of you have to agree that your relationship history together is not part of the equation, the happy, healthy raising of a child between two households is the absolute priority.

Now, if you’re lucky, like I must admit I have been, you’re divorce/separation will be going smoothly and being the best parents you can be is of the upmost importance for you both, which frankly makes the whole process easier to adapt to, for both you and your child. So here are a few things that have helped us adapt to our new solo parenting roles:

GUIDE TO CO-PARENTING

Communication

I know, I know, this seems like an obvious one, but hear me out. There’s a reason you’re getting separating and the chances are, whatever the circumstances of your split, that prior to the decision to go your separate ways, communication has broken down between the two of you and it’s time to learn to do that again, shoddy I know when they are probably the last person you feel like talking to right now, but remember, this part of the process isn’t about how you feel towards your ex, it’s about remaining good parents.

You’ve got to communicate you’re parenting wishes, things you are and are not comfortable with happening, i.e. meeting new partners. But also the simple things; how your child has been sleeping, eating, are they feeling unwell? These things need to be passed between you both to make sure your child remains the focus and is kept happy and healthy.

Be Flexible

You may have a steadfast routine set in place, which is great, you both have your set days/nights/weekends, but life isn’t always able to stick to a strict timetable so you’ve got to learn to bend this routine from time to time.

Maybe you or your ex-partner wishes to take a vacation (whether alone or with the kids!), or your girls are calling for a brunch date next Saturday that you’d really like to attend. Communicate these things; work out how you can switch your days around for that particular date, together. Be sure to do this before committing to any plans outside of your co-parenting routine to minimise any friction about having to change the routine.

Consistency between households

You can’t start playing good cop, bad cop here, it’s confusing for your child and unfair to the other parent (whichever side this is coming from) so please, work out certain things that need to be agreed upon; a few random examples, no chocolate for breakfast (unless of course it’s Easter or Christmas!), bedtime, screen time, etc. All of these things link with the need for good communication! So sit down and work out clear boundaries that everyone is happy with, this way everyone is on the same page and your child has a consistent environment whichever household they are in.

Leave the child out of conversations

Regardless how firm set you are on being a great co-parenting team, there will likely be occasions where conflicts in opinions will happen and things may get heated. So always have any conversations where you feel the need to raise a concern or anything that requires a change to your co-parenting plan, away from your child. You don’t want them to see tension between you, they need to know that both of their parents are happy and can get along.

Remember, you’re trying to create a happy environment for your child, you cannot bring negative energy into their space, it will create confusion for them.

Enjoy your solo time!

Last, but by no means least, enjoy your new free time! Becoming a parent consumes your entire life, but you’ve now been granted this free time to fall back in love with yourself. So go do it, go be adventurous, take a trip, dye your hair, take yourself for lunch, do what makes YOU happy, because believe me, you deserve it. You’ve just gone through a massive life change and there is probably some pretty big emotions to sift through, so use this time to sit with those emotions, process them and come to terms with what it was that was missing in your relationship and become the person that gives you those things.

Choosing to separate from an unhappy relationship is an incredibly brave thing to do; to leave behind the life you created and expected to last a lifetime is monumental. But please hear this, choosing to leave that relationship and raising a child between two households does not make you a bad parent, it makes you a great one. Because you cannot raise a child in an unhealthy environment and expect them to grow up happy and well nurtured. You’ve done the right thing, for yourself and your child. You should be so proud of yourself.

We hope this guide to co-parenting has helped if you are newly separated or struggling to figure things out.

WRITTEN BY VANESSA : @RAISING FREDDIE

PICCOLO RECYCLABLE BABY POUCHES | REVIEW

Filed Under: BABY, ECO PARENTING, MOTHERHOOD // August 23, 2021

What’s yellow, organic and will never end up in a landfill? The brand new Piccolo recyclable baby pouches obviously.

Brightly coloured and the perfect size for grabbing and popping in the change bag for those trips to the beach and zoo. We all know nothing compares to the ease of a pouch on the go, and these are the ideal snack size.

The smoothies are a great consistency as I’ve found some pouches can be really runny. The tropical flavours also smelt really great and Amelia ate the whole thing whilst waving her arms around and telling me off for not spooning it into her mouth fast enough which is definitely a good sign.

The smoothies are fab for allergy babes too as they’re dairy free and gluten free, and vegetarian. I know a lot of mamas spend ages reading the backs of things in supermarkets and all of this information is really obvious on the packaging.

So much about this product makes it clear how much Piccolo cares. They are palm oil free which is fantastic and really important for our planet. Piccolo also give 10% of profits back to charities supporting local families. Family is not obviously an important part of their brand as all of their ingredients are sourced from independent family farms and they are totally organic. They’ve offset the carbon related to their company activities and are working on the carbon used in production in order to become the UK’s first carbon neutral baby food brand.

Once you’ve finished the pouches you can wash them out, and you can fit up to 10 empty pouches back into the boxes to be returned for recycling as the whole pouch is made from just one material. They are palm oil free too which is fantastic and really important for our planet.

The process is very easy and once you’ve packaged the empties up, you just scan the QR code on the back to print the postage label, and send off. Only 20% of local councils recycle the kind of plastic used curb side, so being able to send the pouches back so easily and for free is brilliant. They can then be used again and again to make more Piccolo pouches! How neat! The fact that the whole pouch is one material and can be recycled is a game changer and the ease of returning them means hopefully people will get on board.

I’m really conscious about living sustainably and not becoming overrun with plastic which can be a massive challenge with young children as everything seems to be made from plastic and then wrapped in more plastic. Piccolo are really a step ahead of the rest with this idea and I’m definitely here for it.

Have you tried the Piccolo recyclable baby pouches?

REVIEW WRITTEN BY JODI-LEE @OURLIFEWITHOPIE

Easy Sustainable Swaps | Babies & Children

Filed Under: ECO LIVING, ECO PARENTING, HOME // August 20, 2021

Part three of our sustainable swaps series! When it comes to having babies, as mothers we know that you want to do your best for them and why not team that with doing your best for the planet as well? We have put together some super easy sustainable swaps when it comes to babies & children.

SUSTAINABLE SWAPS

Cloth Nappies

Switching to cloth nappies was the first sustainable swap/change we made to our lives. After months of research, we took the plunge. You know what? It has been a lot easier than we imagined. If you’re main concern is cleaning them, or dealing with poop, I promise you it’s not as bad as you think! The fact is, when you have your own baby, their poop and bodily fluids won’t gross you out as much as you think they will. You just get on with it without thinking about it. You simply pop the poop down the loo, and place the nappy in the basket ready to be washed. We run a nappy wash every evening – it’s just easier that way for us.

Cloth Wipes

This has to be the most simple swap out there! Cloth wipes are amazing! You can buy kits such as Cheeky Wipes! We got our colourful cheeky wipes (AFF LINK) on Amazon over a year ago and they are still going strong! We use a Tupperware box with some water and essential oils in, and it lasts us up to 3 days. As well as a stack of dry wipes for things like mucky hands, spillages, and then an array of flannels for face wiping!

Did you know that it’s recommended to use baby wiles on car wheels as they remove all the crap and grime? Yup. So, if it can do that to a car wheel, imagine what it can do to your little ones sensitive area?! Cloth wipes are super soft, durable, will save you some pennies and (hopefully) reduce the amount of fat burgs clogging up our sewage systems and prevent them from destroying our rivers and oceans.

Wooden and Handmade Toys

I have always had a special place in my heart for wooden children’s toys. I find they are more beautiful, whimsical and stimulate the imagination a lot better than plastic ones that play music, light up and do everything for the child.

This was before the use of plastic and the damage it’s having on the environment was everywhere. Now, there’s an even better reason to buy new wooden toys over plastic. The majority of plastic toys can’t be recycled, or at least not easily. A lot of plastic toys these days have many different components that need to be separated, meaning the toy needs to be pulled apart before recycling. Sometimes this is possible, sometimes this is not. Meaning the majority of plastic toys thrown away each year end up in landfill for many, many, many years. There are some companies out there trying to melt old toys to make new ones, and using recycled materials in general, making them more Eco friendly and easier to recycle – which is amazing in so many ways!

Shopping second hand

Now, It’s no lie that we are Charity shop lovers. We regularly hit the charity shops to see what bargains and gems we can find. From clothing, to books, toys for Molly to even furniture – we love it all! My very first flat was furnished with all second hand items. Even Molly first Christmas and Birthday gifts were mainly from charity shops or Facebook selling groups. There is nothing wrong with second hand items. Buying second hand can actually help the planet as you’re giving those items a new lease of life, and preventing them from going into landfill.

Homemade Snacks & Baby Food

It’s no secret that when you have a child, you automatically become a snack bi**h. Tiny human gets fussy, snack. They won’t sit still, snack. They hurt themselves and start to cry, snack, Snacks are used in multiple situations. The only problem is that most snacks come in single use plastic wrappers, especially the multi packs. You can try and buy snacks that come in boxes as apposed to plastic, but even then, I find there’s plastic in the box which defeats the whole reason you’re buying the box in the first place! We life to make our snacks. We take fresh fruit and I buy things like raisins in bulk. I make fruit leather ( wind ups ) and treats like cookies and rice crispy treats! Minimal plastic.

When you enter the world of weaning, you are inundated with advice and suggestions on what to feed your baby. There is baby food that comes in glass jars, which is fab and so much better than the plastic pouches. However, they still cost ££. Making your own baby food can save you money and a crazy amount of plastic! You could even head down the baby lead weaning route which has you skip the purees all together.

Making your own baby food is super easy! Basically, you puree the food you eat and keep it. You can buy reusable pouches that can be washed and used over and over, or you can put the puree in ice cube trays and freeze them, taking which ever flavours you want when you need them and heat them up either in the microwave ( watching for hot spots ) or over the stove.

I have a blog post of homemade snack and baby food ideas in the works, full of recipes that you can try to make healthy ( ok some aren’t super healthy ) snacks without so much single use plastic! So keep an eye out for that!

Reusable Drinks Bottles

Carrying on from reducing single use plastic and plastic in general, kids drinks bottles. Once your child moves on from breastfeeding or bottle feeding, they move onto a kids cup. Most of these cups are made out of cheap plastic that doesn’t last super long. It either brakes, or if it comes with a straw – you’ll loose that straw! There are so many Eco friendly alternatives out there now. Bamboo being one of the most popular choices of materials. However, for older toddlers/children, Klean Kanteen have a range of stainless steel bottles that are perfect alternatives! They keep drinks at the desired temperature for a long period of time. They are also easy to clean and incredibly durable.

Sustainable Dinnerware

When we made the decision to be more Eco conscious, I knew I wanted to get Molly a plate from Bamboo Bamboo. They produce beautiful bamboo plates in different animal shapes! There are elephants, Monkeys, Pandas and more! We have the Fox plate and the standard toddler plate, as well as the bowl and spoon! The fab thing with these plates is that they have a silicon suction ring on the bottom, meaning you have less of a chance of food going all over the floor.

THE BEST BOOKS TO READ THIS SUMMER

Filed Under: BOOKS, HOME, LIFESTYLE, THAT MAMA BOOK CLUB // August 18, 2021

This past 18 months has seen more & more people looking for a form of escapism and my personal favourite way is through reading. What is better than fully immersing yourself into a new world, other people’s lives and relationships and escaping the mundane. We are here to recommend the best books to read this summer. We have a whole variety of genres from romance to eerie thrillers- all make for easy reading.

Studying For A Master’s Degree As A Parent

Filed Under: HOME, MOTHERHOOD // August 16, 2021

Studying for a master’s degree as a parent is no easy task and today we have a guest post from the lovely Beth sharing her top tips!

As a parent, how many times have you heard ‘well doesn’t life just stop when you have children?’ or ‘your life won’t be your own anymore!’ blah blah blah. Whilst life does CHANGE when sprogs arrive onto the scene, your ambitions and goals should not – they may just need a little fine tuning!

MASTER’S DEGREE AS A PARENT

I just realised I haven’t introduced myself, I’m Beth and I am Mumma to 3-year-old Isla. I am currently in the last three months of my master’s degree in animal welfare science, ethics, and law at the university of Winchester. I’ve been studying this subject and similar since about 2010. What I want to achieve from this blog is to spur you on if you have been toying with the idea of furthering yourself educationally or really in any other aspects of life but feel like you are can’t because you have kiddos.

Flexible accredited online courses are the one!

When you consider getting back into education you may think about enrolment at your local campus, which is fabulous! But for some the physical attendance can create additional obstacles where childcare is concerned, and this may lead to added stress and reluctancy to attend. Fear not, the very iPad/tablet that Karen complains your kid watches to much might be your saving grace (again!)

Many universities and colleges in the UK host a huge variety of courses and qualification in a wide range of fields. Which is great, because it means your options are vast and, in some cases, may even cater to your very specific needs. You can look at any college or university website to see what courses are on offer and what you need for application eligibility.

Each institution will be able to help you with financial advice about loans, bursaries, and grants. This part can be off putting but you don’t have to pay loans back straight away and how much you pay back all depends on how much you are earning after you qualify. You can find more information here (https://www.gov.uk/repaying-your-student-loan). You can also check the government website here (https://www.gov.uk/help-with-childcare-costs/support-while-you-study) to see how you could access childcare support while you study.

Plan, plan and then plan again…

If you’re anything like me, 95% of the time life is totally unmanageable (I assume that’s why gin was invented) and you are needed in about 10 different places for 50 different reasons. However, I have some helpful (you can be the judge of that) suggestions to organise and focus your time.

Grab an annual wall planner! Diaries are all well and good but being able to see all deadlines, social events and work commitments laid out and how close one is to another is helpful with being able to manage time well. Something like this may be just the ticket (https://www.ryman.co.uk/ryman-large-wall-planner-2021-1).
Make your daily/weekly/monthly planning as detailed as possible – including adding time for self-care, it’s very important!
Google GANTT charts and thank me later 😉.
Colour coding is a life saver especially when needing to recall or double check notes (access your inner Monica!)
Lastly, there are some amazing apps such as Trello and Evernote for organisation and Forest: Stay focused which really helps with productivity – all of which I have used personally and recommend!

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Work to your strengths

Deciding to take on a course alongside parenting, working and any other full on life commitments can ignite that dreaded mum/dad/parent guilt because the extra time you once had to grab the toddler another banana, meal prep, or re-tidy the living room for the 100th time before 10am may become a distant memory, but it will be totally worth it. I would suggest and I did this myself, before you start your course, write down three positive reasons which swayed your decision to start studying in the first place. Try to remember that not only are you bettering yourself for your child(ren), but you are also doing it for yourself. You will be able to develop your skills in your chosen field, gain the qualifications you deserve to grab those better paid positions in a company, or grow your self-employed business on a stronger foundation and ultimately work a job that you are passionate about. And when those blues, which will inevitably kick in every now and again pop up, just read those three positive reasons, and remember why you started in the first place!

I am always more than happy to answer any questions or if you just want to talk more about the subject pop me a message through my Instagram, my handle is @beeforanimals.

Did you go to university? Have you studied for a master’s degree whilst being a parent?

Thanks for reading and happy studying!

YOU CAN FIND BETH ON;

INSTAGRAM: @beeforanimals

I DECIDED TO GET A DIVORCE AND WORK ON MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MYSELF

Filed Under: HOME, LIFE // August 13, 2021

Here’s what happened when I decided to get a divorce and work on the relationship with myself…

So here I am, just under 8 weeks away from my 26th birthday and in the process of getting a divorce. Heck, how on earth did that happen? I really didn’t see it coming, for months I blamed lockdown, but after many deep conversations with others and a little time on my own I realised it ran so much deeper than mere relationship troubles caused by the strains of lockdown. In the few weeks it has been since I filed for divorce I’ve sat with it, really processed it in depth and I can’t help but think, why didn’t I see the signs sooner. I was so convinced I was happy and in love with the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with. But the truth is I was with a person who put me back together and held me that way after a narcissistic ex-boyfriend destroyed every shred of my confidence and happiness. I dived so fast into a relationship with him and found comfort, safety and the clarification that I was good enough, things I only knew how to find through the gratification of another, yet now as I sit here typing this, alone in my big empty bed, a single mother and in the middle of a divorce, I am the happiest I have ever been.

Why? Because after months, actually, years, in a cycle of anxiety, low mood and deep unhappiness and generally being unsatisfied with life, trying to pack it full of the things society believed I should be like marriage and having children all before I turned 30. Don’t get me wrong, in no way do I regret having my child, but was I truly ready to become a mother when I did? Absolutely not.

Then it happened and it happened fast, I opened my eyes and realised that I’d been nurturing the wrong relationship all along; I was the person I needed to love me, not someone else. So that is exactly what I decided to do, sure, I’ve thrown my entire life in the air in the process, but once I realised this I just couldn’t waste anymore time being miserable when I knew there was happiness out there somewhere waiting for me; and I was not wrong, I’ve found it, I’ve really found it, the kind of happiness that has you lying in the sun, staring up at the sky and smiling just because the world looks so beautiful in that moment.

I think that’s my point here, I was so consumed in someone else’s happiness being the source of, what I believed to be mine that I was forgetting to live in the moment, breathe and enjoy the simple pleasures life has to offer. I was with someone so pent on planning our future that we were missing out on today. I was skipping out on adventures I’d always wanted to do because they didn’t, burying my spontaneous nature because they always wanted to do the same things, now I’m out here living each day! Sure it’s a juggle at the minute, balancing being a newly single mother, having a job and generally getting the nitty gritty details in order, but I’ve been given the luxury of having some free time and I’m going to make every second count. I’m going to keep doing the things that make ME happy, I’m eating & sleeping better, exercising more (which is doing MIRACLES for my mental health!), planning adventures, hell I even climbed a mountain alone! Okay, so it wasn’t a very big one, but it’s one my Gran would point out to me on the horizon from such a small age, we would sit at the top of the hill by our stables and she’d tell me all about that little mountain in the distance. The sentiment of sitting at the top of that mountain and facing in the direction of that little hill at home set my soul on fire.

I decided to get a divorce… Here’s to the next chapter of my life, filled with happiness, adventure and a whole lot of self love, because you’ve got to love yourself before you can truly be loved by another.

WRITTEN BY NESS : @RAISING FREDDIE

FITTING TRAVEL INTO HOME SCHOOLING

Filed Under: HOME, HOMESCHOOLING, MOTHERHOOD // August 12, 2021

Ad | COLLABORATIVE POST

When you’re home schooling, you have to deal with the reality that you’re often playing to compete with the kind of experience that schools can and it can be difficult without the kinds of resources they have. School trips offer students the opportunity to see parts of the world they might not otherwise, often with an educational bent. Here are our top tips for fitting travel into home schooling.

Finding the spots with educational potential

A big part of any school trip is, of course, that education is made a part of it. It’s not just a vacation (though you should have vacations just for fun with your child, as well, of course), it’s an opportunity to learn. As such, you should look at some of the most educational travel spots that you might be able to visit. Places with rich history, diverse cultures, or that have developed industries that you’re teaching about, such as tech havens, are some examples of spots that might offer a lot of educational potential for your kid.

Organise it with other parents

Finding education travel spots is one thing, but solo travel for just you and your kid might be too expensive to do every once in a while. However, if you are part of any home schooling groups that you have gotten together with before for things like field trips, it might be worth bringing up the subject of booking school trips for multiple kids at once. You can take advantage of group discounts and work with travel agents that are dedicated to helping educational groups find the accommodation and travel opportunities they need.

Keep it local

You don’t necessarily need to go flying abroad anywhere in order to have a great travel experience with your kid. If you can find a spot that’s a little more local and offers just as great educational opportunities, then you may want to make it a staycation, instead. After all, there’s a good chance that the cities close to you have museums and galleries that can offer a nice dip into some historical or cultural education for your child and help you teach all manner of subjects.

Run your school on the road

Now, this is a tip that not everyone is going to be able to meet, simply because it’s quite a demanding and different lifestyle. However, the rise of travel schooling has seen a lot of parents take to the road with their kids, travelling the world with them while providing homeschooling on the road. As you might imagine, that can result in some pretty demanding schedules for the parents, but it also allows for the widest range of opportunities to use the world itself as a teaching tool. Is it a change you could afford to make?

Be sure that you’re aware of your budget and ability to organise when it comes to setting up any trips, especially when you’re organising with multiple families or kids. Offering travel opportunities for your child can be great, but you don’t want to experience undue stress as a result.

FUN INDOOR ACTIVITIES FOR KIDS

Filed Under: PLAY // August 12, 2021

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As a mother, you will want to assist your children and provide them with the resources to learn and grow. You want to ensure that your kids’ needs are satisfied and you offer them or indulge them in the right environment suitable for their development. However, helping your child can be fun as it is helpful! There are various hobbies your child can partake in to develop mentally, physically, and safely. Here are some great indoor activities for kids.

PAINTING

Painting offers an excellent opportunity for your kids to develop and improve their cognitive skills and explore their creativity. Crayons and brushes also help young children develop their finger muscles and improve their hand-eye coordination. You can also introduce your children to the works of great painters to develop an interest and learn more about this activity. While learning to paint, kids can have fun with different colours such as acrylic, oil, or watercolours. Fortunately, there are several DIY paint kits for kids of all ages to get them busy creating masterpieces.

WOODWORKING

Woodworking can be a lot of fun for kids because it gives them the chance to use various tools and logs of wood to create unique items like simple boxes and wooden trays, toys, birdhouses, or DIY photo frames. Exploring the processes of using essential tools such as mallets, glue guns from retailers such as Glue Guns Direct, and the chisel and simple woodworking procedures help your child explore their creative side while improving their motor abilities. Giving your child ample time to practice regularly and educating them about techniques and tools is an excellent method to introduce woodworking to young children. However, keep an eye on your child to prevent any injuries.

DRAWING

You can teach your child simple drawing and sketching techniques to children to draw whatever their imaginations desire. Beginners can learn to draw simple patterns by tracing them and then progress and eventually use their skills to get into more complex works like comic book art. As your child creates narratives, plots, and several characters, there is a lot of brainstorming and creative thinking. This type of hobby can help your child’s cognitive abilities and further help them build a career in animation or become a cartoonist when they are all grown up.

GARDENING

Gardening is another fun hobby to indulge your kids in. Not only do they get to get their hands dirty, but planting a seed and watching it sprout may be a good way for kids to learn care and maintenance. They can learn to tend to beautiful rose flowers or vegetables. Additionally, you can make things more intense and exciting for older kids by allowing them to grow crops without synthetic fertilisers and chemicals. This way, they will practice organic farming, and you can use their products for family meals. It would be a fun hobby for your child to take up. You can encourage your youngster to cultivate vegetables and fruits in your backyard and then enjoy the results.

5 ARGUMENTS FOR LIVING IN THE PRESENT THAT ACTUALLY MAKE SENSE

Filed Under: LIFE, LIFESTYLE // August 12, 2021

AD COLLABORATIVE POST //

Should you be living in the present and enjoy life as it comes to you? Or should you keep one eye on the future at all times?

Society tells us that we should do the latter. But it comes at a terrible cost. We never really get to live an authentic human experience. We constantly worry about what is coming down the pike instead of enjoying what’s in front of us now. It stops us from ever really letting go.

LIVING IN THE PRESENT

In this post, therefore, we take a look at some of the arguments for living in the present that make sense. We’re not saying that you should burn through your life’s savings. But you should go through life reminding yourself that the future never arrives. It’s always out of reach.

You Worry Less

It may surprise you that some of the greatest religious figures throughout history were famous for telling people to live in the present. Jesus, for instance, told people to “care not for the morrow.” Buddha is also famous for telling his disciples to forget about their worldly treasures.

Experiencing your life as it is now is a great way to avoid worrying. Almost always, the sensations you’re receiving by being alive right now are good enough. The main problem is your thoughts, not the reality of the situation.

You Can Focus More

Once you start worrying less, you also find that you naturally start focusing more. All of a sudden, you are able to concentrate on tasks that would have caused you difficulties in the past. Often, you can solve problems that have been vexing you for weeks – perhaps months.

You Can Enjoy Life More

Instead of constantly worrying about money, living in the present gives you permission to enjoy your life more. If now is the right time to go ahead and buy something, you won’t wait. You’ll just get what you need.

If you need a little extra money to tide you over, you’re not afraid to read up on your options on sites like Buddy Loans. You take what you need.

Your Relationships Improve

Living in the moment may also improve your relationships with other people. Friends, family and colleagues may admire you for your “can do” attitude to life. They can see that you have a certain freedom about you, and they will want to know how you’re doing it.

You’ll Let Go Of Your Regrets

When you dwell in the past all the time, you can get into the habit of continually mulling over your regrets. You always look back and wonder what might have been. But, again, that’s an unhealthy way of approaching life. It drains you of energy in the present and it can make you feel depressed.

Living well is all about taking life as it comes. You want to avoid being “sticky” where negative thought patterns rumble around your head for days, weeks or months at a time.

So, after reading this, are you ready to start living in the present?

MY LITTLE ECO SHOP – OCEAN CONSERVATION TRUST BOX

Filed Under: ECO LIVING, GUEST POST, LIFE // August 11, 2021

THIS ITEM WAS SENT TO US IN EXCHANGE FOR A REVIEW – READ OUR DISCLAIMER FOR MORE INFO

OCEAN CONSERVATION TRUST BOX

In June My Little Eco Shop teamed up with Ocean Conservation Trust to bring you this incredible box inspired by Seaspiracy! 10% of revenue from each box sold will go towards Ocean Conservation Charity.

At the end of April, I started on a journey to self-improvement, determined to find more natural ways to boost my self-esteem. I wanted to make small, yet practical changes in the hope of embracing a more sustainable lifestyle.

Having read Jen Gale’s book on ‘The Sustainable(ish) Living Guide’, I learned that ‘you cannot get through a single day without having an impact on the world around you. What you do makes a difference, and you have to decide what kind of difference you want to make.’

Therefore, I became more conscious of my purchases and more conscientious about supporting both local and small businesses by buying sustainable options. Knowing that only 10% of approximately 300 million tonnes of plastic produced every year is recycled, last month, I began by purchasing less plastic items, especially in the beauty department.

When I found out about That Mama Club’s collaboration with a small eco business called ‘Ocean’, I simply knew that it would be a brilliant way to make some small swaps that would help with becoming more eco-conscious. Ocean sent me June’s care package and I was thrilled to find that every product was beautifully presented, great quality, plastic free, and a wonderful sustainable option.

And yet, for some reason, people wrongly believe that the fancier the plastic packaging, the better the product, and the best self-care that they are receiving; but in actual fact, Ocean’s shampoo bar produces a fine lather and cleanses my hair even better than my usual Shampoo bottle in its pretty plastic packaging. I struggle with dry skin and a flaky scalp, and it helped with this quite nicely.

I also loved the bamboo toothbrushes, and even my husband, who I am slightly ashamed to admit was once purchasing several plastic toothbrushes every month, has now stuck to ONE bamboo toothbrush. It is as durable as plastic and I feel happier knowing he isn’t adding to plastic waste.

What’s more, the soft reusable make-up remover discs are perfect for cleaning my face of my rather thick foundation at the end of the day. I simply hand wash them and leave them to air dry. This is much better than purchasing endless cotton pads that come in- you guessed it: plastic!

The bar of soap also came in paper packaging: the cerulean bar felt luxurious against my skin; it was the perfect treat and even Noor, who is so utterly fussy when it comes to soap products, was impressed!

The care package also included biodegradable pods and plastic free power-cleaning Eco Drops that I simply added to water to remove sticky paw prints and window ‘art’ from my home. It really boosted my confidence knowing that I was using a product that hasn’t been tested on animals, is plant based and doesn’t wreak of harsh chemicals.

Finally, I have been on the hunt for a slim, plastic free water bottle, and the metallic one is the perfect size for my teaching bag. It doesn’t leave a sickly taste in my mouth either.

So, why not order an Ocean Conservation Trust package today? Start to feel good about doing something luxurious for yourself without breaking the bank and also helping the world around you. I know I feel much better as a consequence.

REVIEW WRITTEN BY – SEHER @amothersblog

Busting Common Sex Myths That Are Completely False

Filed Under: HOME, LIFE, LIFESTYLE, SEX & RELATIONSHIPS // August 9, 2021

A few months ago we shared common vagina myths that weren’t true and you all loved it, so we thought we would do a part 2 in the Myth Busting series. Today we are sharing common sex myths that aren’t true and boy is there a LOT. We have narrowed it down to 10 of our personal favourites that are all absolutely bullshit.

THIS BLOG POST MAY CONTAIN AFFILIATE LINKS, TO LEARN MORE PLEASE READ OUR DISCLAIMER

COMMON SEX MYTHS

REAL SEX IS JUST LIKE PORN

Hahahaha, no. Absolutely not. Do I want to go at it for hours? No. Do I look like I can be bent like a Stretch Armstrong? HA. Can I experience orgasm after orgasm through penetration? Don’t be stupid. Porn is work. It’s someone’s job. It is created for entertainment.

STI TESTS ARE JUST FOR THOSE WHO “SLEEP AROUND”

A very popular misconception. STI tests are for ANYONE who has unprotected oral, vaginal or anal sex.

CONTRACEPTION IS A WOMAN’S RESPONSIBILITY

Oh, a favourite of mine *cue eye roll*. The decision to have sex is a joint one. I once was about to have sex with a guy and was surprised when I asked if he had any condoms. “Oh no, I presumed you would be on the pill or something…” douche bag. The only way to protect against a sexually transmitted infection (STI) is by using a condom.

YOU CAN’T GET PREGNANT IF THE PENIS “PULLS OUT”

The amount of people who I know have got pregnant by using the pull out method is ridiculous. I don’t know how anyone can have the logic that it would work to prevent pregnancies, but alas. It happens. Before a penis ejaculates, there’s sperm in the pre-ejaculatory fluid (sometimes called pre-come), which leaks out when a person gets an erection.

EVERYONE IS HAVING SEX

Wrong. Having sex is a personal choice and it honestly makes me sad the amount of people rush into it because they think everyone is doing it. Also, if you have had sex one – don’t feel pressured to do it again. Wait until you are ready.

VAGINAS GET LOSER THE MORE PEOPLE THEY HAVE SEX WITH

Nope. No. The vagina is a muscle that expands and contracts. It also baffles me how a person with a vagina could have sex with the same partner for 10 years and nothing be thought of it, but one who has multiple sexual partners over that same time and her vagina must be the size of the Grand Canyon. People need to fucking behave.

VIRGINITY APPLIES TO ONLY VAGINAL SEX

It’s no secret that I despise the term “losing your virginity”, you don’t LOSE anything and i’ll be damned if a penis is that special it changes my identity. The word “virginity” has been used to describe a heterosexual woman who has not had vaginal sex. This obviously does not represent people of all genders and sexual orientations, who are likely to have a different meaning of virginity. Your “first time” is extremely personal and means something different to each person.

MASTURBATION IS HARMFUL TO YOUR SEX LIFE

Listen, as long as it feels good for you and you enjoy it – go forth and wank. Masturbating is healthy and safe. It isn’t for everyone which we fully understand. There’s no right or wrong way to go about it. Whether you prefer the use of toys to help you orgasm or good old fashioned hand. It is very much an each to their own type scenario.

ANAL SEX IS ONLY FOR GAY MEN

This is such an outdated notion that it is laughable. Wanting to try different sexual activities with your partner does not mean anything about your sexual orientation.

VAGINA OWNERS ALWAYS EXPERIENCE AN ORGASM THROUGH PENETRATIVE SEX

If only it was that easy eh? A recent study showed that 40% of women orgasm through penetrative sex, where as the other 60% need “assistance”, whether that it through toys* or clitoral stimulation.

There you have it! 10 common sex myths that are completely untrue. Did you believe any of these growing up?

WORLD BREASTFEEDING WEEK 2021 | YOUR JOURNEYS

Filed Under: HOME, MOTHERHOOD, PREGNANCY // August 7, 2021

World Breastfeeding Week 2021 // something I am so incredibly passionate about. I have been breastfeeding for over 4 years now. My first son I exclusively breastfed him until he was 3 and he self weaned the day his little brother was born who is also still exclusively breastfed at 18 months – I have such a love/hate with it if I’m honest. It is my FAR the most mentally draining thing I have ever done. A lot of people give this unrealistic idea that breastfeeding is beautiful; full of quiet moments and cuddles.. which sometimes it is…

But it’s also full of pressure, lack of faith in you and your body and it’s also incredibly isolating. My partner could be sat right next to me in bed whilst I fed our babies and I never felt more alone. Breastfeeding a toddler is a whole other ball game – he’s winding his legs round my head and playing stretch Armstrong with my other nipple.

I have received strange looks whilst feeding out in public – or an eye roll, (spoiler – I am not a subtle feeder, the baby wants feeding, I’m not fannying about with a blanket or making sure I’m decent. It’s a tit. People need to calm down and mind their own) but I have also received the most LOVELY comments. However you chose to feed your baby, I don’t care. Honestly. As long as they’re fed, happy and YOU are happy.. go forth and do what you gotta do to survive because lord knows there’s bigger shit to worry about than how OTHER people choose to feed their children. I’m sending you all so much love – those who are breastfeeding, you’re doing amazing! And those who find this week hard for various reasons – you are sensational.

We reached out to various people from our Instagram community and asked them to share their breastfeeding experiences; donating milk, tandem feeding, mastitis and so many more!

WORLD BREASTFEEDING WEEK 2021

I breastfed from only one boob for mainly my second baby (milo) but half way through my first baby (Rocco) too. This was a challenge in its self. Milo was a very hungry boy so we had some days were he was constantly on the breast. So we give him the bottle just after a week old. As feeding from one boob, the supply just couldn’t cope and he was too hungry. He’s was combie fed from 2 weeks old.

I’ve suffered with an inverted nipple on my left breast ever since Rocco, who I managed to feed for 6 months. I thought it would go back to normal once Milo arrived but it never did and it killed me to try get Milo to feed from it so we stopped straight away on that side. (It’s still inverted.) So I had a breast cancer panic, luckily it’s not, but I’m glad I went and got it checked out! They don’t know the reason why it’s done this, so I’ll be forever wondering why. It’s been a rollercoaster ride but I wouldn’t of had it any other way, I love the bond from it & I’m proud we lasted 13 weeks just on one boob! – ALICE

I was 19 when I had my first daughter, my mum didn’t breastfeed me or my sister and none of my friends had kids. I really wasn’t sure what I was doing! I have a bit of an over supply and I was pumping too much early on. I ended up getting mastitis 3 times, so I stopped after the last time, my daughter was 6 months old. She was such a chill baby, she would take a bottle of expressed milk from the get go, and when I first offered her formula she chugged it! She loved it and didn’t really care. My second daughter is now 9 months and I’m still breastfeeding her, it’s going well. I think I knew what to expect this time, I’m also older and wiser!! I didn’t get an electric pump this time, I opted for a Haakaa pump. I think this helped with my over supply as it takes the edge off without completely emptying my boobs which helped them adjust to what my daughter needs instead of what I’m pumping. She is also a lot more clingy than my first, she loves being breastfed and isn’t too keen on a bottle! Both experiences have been so different. I’m very thankful for being able to breast feed both my daughters. It’s been a wonderful experience and nothing is better than the feeding cuddles. I’m hoping to get to my daughters first birthday.. wish me luck! – ISOBEL

I don’t know why but breastfeeding has always been so important to me. Maybe it’s because none of my close family had ever breastfed and they’ve always sort of frowned upon it, it made me want to prove a point. I certainly struggled at first with my first born. I just couldn’t quite get his latch right on the left side which ended up severely cracked. This meant he favoured the right and it became engorged and led to mastitis!

I was so lucky enough to have some support through this. Also being pro-boob I followed lots of breastfeeding pages that were a massive help, especially @milkmakingmama and @boo.b.ltd. Fast forward three years and I’ve now successfully breastfed one son for two years and my second is still going strong at nine months. So my advice to any new mama’s would be give it a go because the benefits are endless, seek out advice and weather it’s the first feed, expressed, combi, for just a couple of weeks or even a couple of years give yourself a massive pat on the back because making liquid gold isn’t easy. – MADISON

Hi I’m Sydney, a first time mama to two year old Atticus and a post-breastfeeding mum. To mark Breastfeeding Awareness Week, I wanted to share my journey. From the moment I found out I was pregnant I knew I wanted to breastfeed. I thought it would be natural and easy, but little did I know, I didn’t know much about it at all. I had a very quick labour, and when Atticus was placed on my chest, he naturally started nuzzling but couldn’t latch. Within one or two hours of giving birth I was told Atticus had an upper tongue tie and that breastfeeding would be a struggle. I had never heard of this before; straight away I panicked and sobbed that I just wanted to feed my baby.

I was so lucky to have such an amazing midwife, who came into my room and gave me syringes to collect colostrum. I remember how calm and patient she was as she sat with me on the bed, helping me collect my milk while I struggled to get the hang of it. Yet I was determined to make breastfeeding work; knowing I had the milk meant I wasn’t giving up easily. As the hours flew by I persisted with putting Atticus to my breast and he was trying so hard to latch. Fast forward a day later, I was still using the syringes but I felt defeated as it just wasn’t happening for us. I remember sobbing and hobbling down the hallway to find a midwife, and asking for a bottle because I just couldn’t do it anymore.

But she believed in me even when I didn’t and said, “let’s give it one last go”. To my surprise he latched, perfectly and pain free. I will always remember that moment, it was just magical. I never experienced any pain or discomfort throughout my whole journey, which was a surprise to me. The doctor said he may have a slight tongue tie but if it wasn’t causing any issues he wouldn’t need the procedure. (So Atticus never had it done.) When I bought Atticus home, the midwives didn’t give me much information on breastfeeding. I’d received the usual chart and spoken briefly about the amount of feeds he should have in 24hrs. But as he was feeding a lot more than what they said, I started to panic thinking I wasn’t providing him with enough. He was constantly on the boob, even if he wasn’t feeding he would just like to be very close to the boob (which I now know is completely normal).

I was so lucky to find an amazing support group on Facebook. There were hundreds of women with questions and we supported each other to learn about cluster feeding, leaps and the many other benefits to breastfeeding. I found my journey with breastfeeding empowering. I would always feed in public without covering up. I was very lucky to never experience any negative / bad comments, which only contributed to my positive experience. There were, of course, bad days: the constant demand, the feeling of being touched, the claustrophobia. I never spoke openly about how I was feeling because I was scared of judgment. But just because I held it close doesn’t mean you should to.

To any mama reading this, please talk to a friend a family member or whoever you feel comfortable. So many people are there to listen and help you. I always said I wanted to breastfeed for the first year but no longer, yet I ended up breastfeeding for 14 months. I still remember the last feed, knowing it was the last time, I felt sad but proud of how far we come. Atticus self weaned and it was the best time for both of us. I think by then we had both just had enough. I personally found the change huge and it was a real struggle going from a baby to a one year old, not to mention that the nip lash was real! – SYDNEY

After getting pregnant I had always assumed that I would try to breastfeed, and it was always asked at appointments if that was my intention. I remember the first time they put Ivy to my breast it felt so overwhelming, I’d refused whilst they stitched me up as I was bit out of it. Then I was knackered and I had the midwives planting this little gorgeous little bundle on my chest, and she was struggling to latch and they were asking me if she was latching – though how the hell a first time mum is supposed to know I’ve no idea. I opted to stay in to get help with breastfeeding but I didn’t find it amazing, each midwife tried something different, suggested something different and I did not feel encouraged to give formula if needed (though she was likely hungry and it would have calmed her thinking back).

So I left hospital with this little bundle, not latching and feeling clueless on how to get her to do so. I had no milk issues it flowed fine but the next month became a pressure keck of trying to get her to latch, pumping breast milk and topping up with formula to get levels right and trying every trick. My health visitor helpful but after about four weeks the mental toll of feeling like a constant feeding cow and the cleaning took its toll and I opted to go full formula. She took bottles like a champ and I felt better knowing she was getting the food she needed. I still feel sometimes like I’ve failed in some way but I had a very supportive family and had a health visitor who fully supported my decision. If I have a second child I will try to breastfeed again, and hopefully feel more confident about it this time. But if it’s formula then I know I’ve made the best decision as at the end of the day, a fed baby is a happy baby. – LINDSEY

Being brought up in a pretty devout Catholic family, the image of the Madonna, boob out, nursing an angelic baby Jesus is sort of etched onto my brain: and – weirdly – I think it’s this sort of image that created my pre-baby expectation of what breastfeeding would be like: an innately tranquil experience, with a sacred vibe. So, when my daughter arrived in 2017, via emergency C section, wouldn’t latch properly and I had to pump and bottle feed her, I felt as if I was the only mum in the world that was genuinely useless at breastfeeding. Thankfully, rather belatedly, once I’d been home a few weeks, I got help from my Health Visitor (who recommended using nipple shields) and eventually Little Miss learnt to latch and feed. Having been on the receiving end of several nasty remarks, I was very shy about breastfeeding out and about, and I spent a lot of time feeding in public loos; however, despite all this, I breastfed successfully for a year until the process naturally came to an end.

With my son, a 2020 lockdown bubba, also born by EMCS, my journey was higgledy-piggledy for different reasons. He was a NICU baby and so, after our very first feed, he was taken away from me and whisked off; so, for the first few days all I could do was pump and bag up my milk ready for someone else to feed him. He didn’t gain weight properly, was constantly sick and miserable, and 3 weeks later he started haemorrhaging; he was diagnosed with an acute Cows’ Milk Protein Allergy – he was severely allergic to the traces of dairy present in my breastmilk. So, I was told that if I wanted to continue to breastfeed him, I would have to eliminate dairy (and soya) from my diet until he was completely weaned. And I have – and it’s made the world of difference to him; he’s a happy baby now and I’m able to breastfeed him with relative ease (he has just got his first two teeth in though, so I won’t say it’s always a comfortable process!); I’m hoping to be able to continue to breastfeed him at least until his first birthday.

So when I think of my breastfeeding journey, it doesn’t marry with the image of the Nursing Madonna, it’s been a journey of cabbage leaves and lanolin cream; 4 different breast pumps, vegan cheese, washable nursing pads and good old nipple shields: but that’s okay, actually: that’s pretty brilliant; I’ve fed two small people all by myself, and if I can’t give myself a pat on the back for that during #WORLDBREASTFEEDINGWEEK then when can I! – ISSY

A complicated pregnancy and unexpected four weeks in Neonatal ICU, meant I wasn’t surprised to find myself feeling low following the birth of my eldest son and I began to suspect I had post natal depression, or PTSD. However, as the days, weeks and months passed and the periods between feeds increased, it became clear that the overwhelming ‘lows’ only occurred as my let down began. No warm, fuzzy feeling for me and definitely no ‘settling down with a piece of cake’. In short, my ‘let down’ was a total let down.

I described the sensation to a lactation consultant, who told me about D-MER (Dysphoric – Milk Ejection Response/Reflex). She explained how changes in Dopamine levels, which occur as a normal part of breastfeeding, were causing the sudden and intense waves of negative emotion. As D-MER is a spectrum hormonal response, the intensity and duration vary from person to person. I continued to breastfeed my eldest son for 15 months and experienced D-MER during every feed and I continue to do so whilst feeding my, now five month old, second son. There is no treatment for D-MER. However, having a name for it and an understanding of what it is, makes it easier to live with…I simply save the cake until later. For more information about D-MER and the role Dopamine has to play, here https://d-mer.org

–CHARLOTTE

My breastfeeding journey started with my first born, Cosmo who was born in May 2019. It was hard at first, he never seemed satisfied and wasn’t putting on weight. We were sent to paediatrician’s and lactation consultants and various midwives and no one seemed to be able to figure out why it wasn’t working. Then we saw Zoe, a lactation consultant who funnily enough was the mother of a girl I’d been teaching for years! Zoe diagnosed Cosmo with a tongue tie. It was slight, but enough to be causing the issues we were having. He was 8 weeks old at this point, so my supply had absolutely plummeted and I was desperate to get it back up to be able to feed Cosmo full time. We were already topping him up with formula and I had started pumping to try to increase my supply and be able to top him up with breast milk. I also started using an sns, which is a bottle with small tubes attached that supplement baby at the breast. This helped to encourage Cosmo to increase his strength and appetite by giving him more food at the breast.

Zoe had also suggested using nipple shields to give Cosmo the ‘trigger’ of the nipple on his soft palette. My nipples were very flat, on large breasts, trying to feed a baby with a small mouth, a tongue tie and a high soft palette-the anatomy of us wasn’t fitting well! As soon as I put the shield on Cosmo latched and started feeding with vigour, I nearly cried. Nipple shields are generally only recommended as a short term fix and therefore there is quite a lot of shame associated with them. Amongst all the paraphernalia that I was using, shields, the sns, pumping and topping up with formula, there were times that I felt real sadness and shame that I wasn’t able to feed my baby just at the breast. But somehow I just kept going, and bit by bit I was able to top him up less and to stop pumping. Cosmo breastfed for nearly 2 years and self weaned when I was about 20 weeks pregnant with his sister. We used shields for all of that time and by the end he only fed from one boob. Looking back I am so grateful to have had all the paraphernalia available to me. It meant I was able to breastfeed my baby for all of that time!

Fast forward and I’m just over two weeks into breastfeeding my daughter Veda. It’s completely different. She was on the boob 5 mins after she was born, before I got out of the birth pool. Her latch is good and she’s satisfied after feeding. She’s putting on weight well. I have absolutely no anxiety or gut feeling that something isn’t right. This time round is what I naively expected my first time round to be, and I’m sure I’m not alone in feeling that way. I didn’t realise how difficult it could be. There’s so much education about pregnancy and birth and so little offered during that journey about breastfeeding! I do feel grateful that I had a difficult experience with Cosmo, even though it was incredibly hard and emotionally draining, it’s made me appreciate how naturally it can happen, if things align! – BELLA

You know those videos they show you at antenatal class of a text book first feed where the baby army crawls up their Mama’s tummy and latches? Well I had that exact first feed. My beautiful baby girl shuffled her way up, lifted her head and attached her wide open mouth to my right breast in a move that wouldn’t have looked out of place on a hungry hippos board game. I think I was still high on a wave of post birth euphoria because I didn’t even have any pain. We stayed in our delivery suite all night, topless (me) and feeding often (both of us!).

I had anticipated that the first feed on my left breast might not be quite as simple as my nipple has always been inverted. I had spoken to a midwife during my pregnancy and they said that as the nipple could come out it should be ok as baby would draw it out. Turns out it wasn’t quite that simple and we couldn’t get a left sided latch without the nipple out.

Left sided latching was quite the feat in those early days. Each time I would have to get Ava-Rae into position, then gently squeeze to push the nipple out and hold to keep the nipple ready while she latched. Every time she came off, my nipple would disappear faster than a toddler left unattended with a crayon and we would have to repeat the process to get her back on. Some feeds were more successful than others. Some just ended up with a very vocal, hungry bubba being switched to the right side because trying to latch a distressed baby onto a tricky nipple just wasn’t worth the tears (both of us again!).

I spoke to the midwife when they called to discharge us at around 4wks old about it. Left sided latching was still a bit of a performance and I was getting quite a lot of pain in that nipple. Beyond the initial toe curling latch pain (if you’re there right now Mama’s, it does pass I promise) I could literally feel my nipple being drawn out of my body with every little suck. It could bring tears to my eyes on a bad day. The midwife suggested that I could try a nipple shield, and in the same breath told me if I started with a nipple shield I was unlikely to ever be able not to use one. She also suggested that if it was “that bad” I could just feed on the right side, and in the same breath told me that my right breast might not be able to supply enough milk. Or if my left breast dried up and I had a problem with the right I may have to stop feeding. And that I would look lopsided. I opted to persevere.

Thankfully there is no horror story that comes as a result of me persevering. We managed it and eventually at around 8 weeks she became able to draw the nipple out herself more so latching became easier. Not perfect, but better. And overtime the pain did subside, although it never really went away. But it horrifies me now looking back to think that was the extent of the support I was offered. That I was made to feel that just persevering was really my only option if I wanted to feed.

Today we are coming up to our 16 month breastfeeding anniversary. And for the last 6 months or so it has been a right sided only feeding journey. There was never a conscious decision to stop feeding from my left breast. And even today I still have a supply – significantly diminished I’m sure – in that breast. It just happened subconsciously. As we were out and about more and she would get distracted feeding and want to look around I would put her to my left breast less and less. Offering her the side with the easier latch meant less time for me sitting in public with my nipple just out for the fun of it. And then gradually at home the left side was offered less and less too.

Mamas if you are struggling with your journey, reach out. Speak to friends, message other Mamas on Insta, push your health visitor to help you. But only push as hard as feels right for you. Don’t quit on a bad day, but don’t make every day a bad day by pushing past something that doesn’t feel right to you. Your breastfeeding journey is incredible no matter how long it lasts because the best feeding journey is the one that is right for you. – GINA

TOP GIFTS FOR EXPECTANT MOTHERS

Filed Under: MOTHERHOOD, PREGNANCY // August 6, 2021

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Whether you are looking to support your friend throughout their pregnancy or prepping for a loved ones baby shower, there are many reasons why you might be on the lookout for the perfect gifts for an expectant mother. After all, as their baby grows, they are dedicating all of their time and energy into the little bundle of joy – which means that they deserve a little something special to make them smile too!

WHAT ACCESSIBILITY MEANS AS A MOTHER

Filed Under: GUEST POST, HOME, MOTHERHOOD // August 6, 2021

WHAT ACCESSIBILITY MEANS?

MORE THAN BARE MINIMUM!

Hi, I’m Steph, mum to Ciara 5 and very soon to be mum to a baby boy too.

I’ve never had great health, I was born 12 weeks premature and growing up I suffered hormone imbalances, bladder issues, bouts of mental ill health and I’ve had countless surgeries investigating causes for chronic and unexplained, but very real, pain.

During my first pregnancy in 2015 I was diagnosed with Symphis pubis dysfunction at 16 weeks, a condition where your pelvic joints separate making simple activities like standing and walking, agony. By 25 weeks I was wheelchair bound. Stripped of my independence, ability to walk and generally combat life – my mental health took a turn.

Later came a preeclampsia diagnosis, a horrendous womb infection and a NICU stay with our baby girl.

For the first few months after Ciara’s birth, my mobility returned to some semblance of normal but I was instead plagued with all over body pain, profound fatigue, and left feeling generally unwell for long periods at a time. Though I had suffered unexplained chronic pain before this was different, it was everywhere and it wasn’t just pain. After many visits to my GP, once finally referred to rheumatology, it was confirmed later that year that I have Fibromyalgia syndrome.

Fibromyalgia effects my life significantly, it affects my sleep, days out with my family, my mood, my functionality, mobility and also my cognitive function. Fibromyalgia is categorised as a pain condition and though pain is indeed a huge factor of this condition, impacting my life on a daily basis, it is by no means the only factor.

Some days I am unable to get out of bed, cook a meal, play with my daughter or work, and I am often left bed ridden for over a week every month.

When I found out I was pregnant a second time, I was worried about how pregnancy would impact fibromyalgia symptoms for me. It turns out my worry was valid when again at 16 weeks I was diagnosed with symphis pubis dysfunction and given crutches. Crutches require strength that my chronically ill body doesn’t have and so I am now using a mobility scooter to get around.

The trouble with this is, we live in an ableist society, in a society that is unprepared for ambulatory mobility aid users, a society that believes disabled people can and should live full lives on the very bare minimum of accessibility.

On a good day pre pregnancy, I could do things most healthy people can enjoy, like walk on the beach, eat meals on a picnic bench, go for a forage in the woods and so on. Now I cannot stand unaided I can’t do any of the aforementioned activities. I cannot walk on uneven ground even when supported by crutches. I cannot sit on a chair or bench that doesn’t have a back.

With the easing of lockdown restrictions over the last month or so it has been highlighted to me again with stark reality that society has made the very minimum of changes for disabled people.

A few examples I’ve come across in recent months are, trying to buy a new sofa, I couldn’t view it in store because it was on an upper floor with no lift. I have had to change dental practices because mine is two flights of stairs above a shop, with no lift or ground floor consulting room, and no accessible parking.

Other restrictions include not being able to go on days out with my family and enjoy all of the facilities at farm parks and playgrounds, not being able to meet friends for lunch because the bar or restaurant they’ve chosen only has high stools or picnic benches to sit on, stairs to toilets and entrances without ramps for scooters and wheelchairs. Who knew that disabled people still wanted a life, eh? News flash – we do!

What’s often even less considered by healthy people is the cost accrued trying to live a ‘normal’ life as a person who requires aids and accessibility in order to do so.

Since losing my mobility in pregnancy I’ve had to make changes in my home, including buying a new bed, a bigger car that can accommodate my mobility scooter, a new sofa because I couldn’t lower myself onto the old one. As you can imagine, this has cost thousands of pounds. The only state support I’ve received has been the installation of grab rails and a shower seat completed by my local council.

At the moment nobody is very hopeful about how and if my mobility will return post partum, and even if I go back to ‘normal’ my normal is still disabled, living with a disability that impacts my life regularly.

I’m the first to admit I carried a lot of internalised ableism before I became unwell. Even once I was unwell but still mobile, I had no real idea the implications people who aren’t mobile face every second of every day. Trying to navigate a disabled life is hard and doing it with children is something else.

Many aspects of your day needs to be planned in advance. I find I do a lot of the mental workload now, and offload the physical onto my husband, but though amazing in so many ways, even he has found letting go of inherent ableism particularly difficult.

Since being unable to stand in the kitchen and cook meals, I’m also no longer able to reach into high cupboards or climb on a chair to turn the fire alarm off when the toast is burning at 7am. It doesn’t come naturally to others to think of these things until they experience them and I understand that, because it didn’t come naturally to me either.

Many disabled people are ambulatory wheelchair and mobility aid users, which means they don’t need them all the time. This can be even harder for the general public to understand. But it is a necessary consideration to enable us to live in a more inclusive society.

What I hope to achieve from talking about these topics is to draw attention to the need for more accessibility everywhere, and that doesn’t just mean ramps and lifts, it means adequate seating, it means flexible working, it means baby groups that don’t just involve parents all sat in a huddled circle on the floor. It means automatic doors, lower shelving in supermarkets, accessible holiday parks, considerate parking, paved pathways in green spaces. It means more support for sunflower lanyard wearers…. And so much more.

As a mother it also means teaching our children about equality and inclusivity. It means letting them know that people have a variety of differences and compassion, kindness and consideration are all free, so we can sprinkle it wherever we go.

Awareness amongst other parents is also crucial. It helps us to support each other and find genuine connections in the parenting community for people who might be experiencing similar struggles.

I’m disabled, but I’m still a mother, still a wife, still a friend and person who wants to live just as a fulfilling life as anyone else.

WRITTEN BY STEPH : @DIVAMUMSTEPH

Summer Bucket List Ideas

Filed Under: LIFE, LIFESTYLE // August 4, 2021

The Summer holidays are officially here and as parents we know all too well how hard it is to come up with fresh and fun ideas to keep the kids entertained. It can be incredibly expensive to plan lots of big family days out so we have put together a list of 50 fun and cheap summer bucket list ideas. Ranging from camping, joining in with a beach clean to tie-dying t-shirts, there is something for every age!

Make S’mores
Take photos with @littlepaperswans ‘The Big Summer Photo Hunt’
Watch a movie outdoors
Random acts of kindness
Walk barefoot on the grass
Go camping – the garden counts!
Try geo-caching
Make fruit smoothie ice pops
Paint rocks then hide for someone else to find
Join a beach clean
Make daisy chains
Have a water fight
Visit your local library
Make wildflower crowns
Go rock pooling
Climb a tree
Grow your own mushrooms
Minibeast hunt
Visit the zoo
Visit an outdoor sculpture park
Bake a new dish as a family
Plant a herb garden
Visit a pick it yourself farm…
… and then make jam!
Family board game night
Fly a kite
Write postcards to friends and family
Play Pooh sticks
Make ice cream floats
Have a breakfast picnic
Learn how to skim rocks on a lake/river
Collect sea shells
Make Sun Tea
Find a local car boot sale and trawl for treasure!
Go for ice cream
Stargaze
Make Tree rubbings
Journal or paint outdoors
Take a family photo
Get takeout coffee (for the grownups) and cake (for the little ones!)
Raise butterflies and release them
Blow giant bubbles
Go for a bike ride
Tie-dye some old t-shirts
Fly paper aeroplanes
Make plant pots out of your recycling and grow some seeds
Stay up late and watch a sunset
Press flowers
Make bunting and decorate your tent (or living room!) with it
Join in with TMC kids play prompt of the month!

Please let us know if you do any of these ideas and make sure to tag us on Instagram @thatmamaclub

BEING CLASSED AS A GERIATRIC MOTHER

Filed Under: HOME, MOTHERHOOD, PREGNANCY // August 2, 2021

When I saw those words GERIATRIC PREGNANCY in my notes it absolutely made my insides cringe when I became a mum for the first time at 29. I was 29. I was young, vibrant, on trend (nearly wrote “trendy” then and really showed my “geriatric” status) which made the words scrawled all over every page of my notes stick in my throat like some ugly word vomit. That was almost 11years ago. I’m a mother of two now and I birthed my second 7months ago (at nearing 39) again I got placed in the “geriatric mother” column when I booked in at the midwife.

I’m mean don’t get me wrong I’m not offended now as I was then, but I can see why some women would be if they were first time mums. I’m perplexed at why they would label anyone over the age of 12 “geriatric”? (Slight exaggeration on the age I know, but it’s the go to number for anyone younger than me).

I certainly did not feel like booking myself into the nearest nursing care home (although today it does sound appealing just to have a break from my loving children-who’s with me?!) when I first saw it in my antenatal notes. To be completely honest, I actually feel the most healthiest, energised, comfortable in my skin and firm on my parental choices this time around, more than ever.

Maybe that’s the key, in my twenties I was consumed with overwhelming anxiety about getting it “right”, you know for the “people” -like I was some Kardashian sister that had the paparazzi following her every move! The countless real geriatrics in hair nets, offering an unwavering amount of advice, that to be honest much has come true, but at the time was somewhat overwhelming in the tampon aisle at the supermarket.

Heading towards 40, I’m more informed in life, I’ve grown a bit in maturity (just about) but more importantly I’m trying to listen to my own maternal instincts more than just grabbing the nearest parenting tip book or the phone for a quick google search. Although, hands up, I’m still guilty of that too, just because I’m a little older doesn’t mean I’m not still as vulnerable like all the other new mums out there.

During every midwife and hospital appointment I was treated with delicate care , I was considered a RISK- like I could self combust at any moment “here she comes the geriatric mother, quick take her vitals before her ovaries wither away” ultimately it made me feel unbelievably anxious that they considered my body was not up to the job due to my age. They listed off every possible complication my pregnancies could have had and asked what age appropriate tests I would be opting for (I did comment to one midwife that I had passed the 11+ grammar school exam, at one routine appointment, it didn’t go down too well) and literally they took every ounce of my blood for a plethora of vials.

Now, I understand they have to “cover all options” so to speak and do the appropriate testing for gestational diabetes, pre-eclampsia, high blood pressure etc but when you very rarely get the same community midwife at consecutive appointments the anxiety just builds having them explain the same concerns and doing the same tests over and over again.

What I was also asked at majority of appointments was why I had an age gap between my pregnancies?, (it seems they really do like to focus on age). Was the second one an accident? New relationship? I could feel my throat burning up, as I entered into some sort of therapy session with every question I answered.

So, why was I given the geriatric status? -I reached for trusty google again and found the following information:

“Traditionally, a geriatric pregnancy is one that occurs anytime a woman is over the age of 35” according to parent.com, “Fecundability, or the probability of achieving a pregnancy in one menstrual cycle, begins to decline significantly in the early 30s, with a more rapid decline a few years later at about 37 years,” explains Margarita Mercado-Medina, therefore the older you get the less chance you have of conceiving, as there are less eggs that are available. There’s also seems to be no medical evidence to suggest a healthy woman in the 30’s, that eats well, takes her vitamins and leads a healthy lifestyle is no less complications than her counterpart in her twenties.

Ok, I get all that. I understand the heightened medical issues that seem to surround a pregnancy later on in life but what I don’t understand is the medical classification, some NHS Primary care trusts are using the terminology “mothers of advanced maternal age” and I don’t think I prefer to be in that column either. Both just conjure up images of ladies with a blue rinses in flannelette nighties, making their way round the maternity wards.

These days women are choosing to start their families later on in life when they feel more established or more financially secure and so they should be allowed to do so without the stigma being attached. Gone are the days of 1970’s marriages when you were classed as “left on the shelf” in your early twenties. Society has changed, refreshingly for the better, older mums are here to stay but however it’s seems the terminology surrounding women in general, are still stuck in the Middle Ages (no pun intended).

Even at 29 I was financially established, I had my teaching career, marriage, house, all that was left were the 2.4 children, yet I still felt I wasn’t “old enough” to be a mum. Daft I know, looking back I felt like all the actual geriatrics somehow knew better and their judging eyes bore holes into me wherever I went. Is this why women are waiting till later? So they can be more assertive in their parental choices? I certainly know of more assertive mothers who had children at 16 than I was in my 29 years of age.

So it begs the question, does an age label matter when it comes to pregnancy? To answer it bluntly NO. I really don’t think it does.

Personally, I think there should be no labels given, it should reside on the woman’s medical background and any underlying issues she may have on the level of care she may need and not just solely based on her age bracket.

If they really do need a label to scrawl over every page of the notes, then the only label that should be given to a pregnant women is “mother”. No woman should ever be made to feel like utter crap when at her most vulnerable state.

If I’m ever blessed with another I’m going to wear a number badge, like a proud 5 year old celebrating their birthday….. and I shall go forth and wear my badge with pride. *slowly steps off her soap box to take a bow*

Peace and love Olivia xx

Archives for August 2021

*THIS POST MANY CONTAIN AFFILIATE LINKS – CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE ABOUT AFFILIATE LINKS

SATISFYER PRO 2 REVIEW

FIRST IMPRESSIONS:

NEGATIVES:

OVERALL:

WHAT IS TOXIC SHOCK SYNDROME?

WHAT ARE THE CAUSES?

WHAT ARE THE SYMPTOMS?

WHAT IS THE TREATMENT?

GUIDE TO CO-PARENTING

Communication

Be Flexible

Consistency between households

Leave the child out of conversations

Enjoy your solo time!

WRITTEN BY VANESSA : @RAISING FREDDIE

REVIEW WRITTEN BY JODI-LEE @OURLIFEWITHOPIE

SUSTAINABLE SWAPS

Cloth Nappies

Cloth Wipes

Wooden and Handmade Toys

Shopping second hand

Homemade Snacks & Baby Food

Reusable Drinks Bottles

Sustainable Dinnerware

MASTER’S DEGREE AS A PARENT

Flexible accredited online courses are the one!

Plan, plan and then plan again…

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Work to your strengths

YOU CAN FIND BETH ON;

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Here’s what happened when I decided to get a divorce and work on the relationship with myself…

WRITTEN BY NESS : @RAISING FREDDIE

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Finding the spots with educational potential

Organise it with other parents

Keep it local

Run your school on the road

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PAINTING

WOODWORKING

DRAWING

GARDENING

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LIVING IN THE PRESENT

You Worry Less

You Can Focus More

You Can Enjoy Life More

Your Relationships Improve

You’ll Let Go Of Your Regrets

THIS ITEM WAS SENT TO US IN EXCHANGE FOR A REVIEW – READ OUR DISCLAIMER FOR MORE INFO

OCEAN CONSERVATION TRUST BOX

REVIEW WRITTEN BY – SEHER @amothersblog

COMMON SEX MYTHS

REAL SEX IS JUST LIKE PORN

STI TESTS ARE JUST FOR THOSE WHO “SLEEP AROUND”

CONTRACEPTION IS A WOMAN’S RESPONSIBILITY

YOU CAN’T GET PREGNANT IF THE PENIS “PULLS OUT”

EVERYONE IS HAVING SEX

VAGINAS GET LOSER THE MORE PEOPLE THEY HAVE SEX WITH

VIRGINITY APPLIES TO ONLY VAGINAL SEX

MASTURBATION IS HARMFUL TO YOUR SEX LIFE

ANAL SEX IS ONLY FOR GAY MEN

VAGINA OWNERS ALWAYS EXPERIENCE AN ORGASM THROUGH PENETRATIVE SEX

WORLD BREASTFEEDING WEEK 2021

WHAT ACCESSIBILITY MEANS?

MORE THAN BARE MINIMUM!

WRITTEN BY STEPH : @DIVAMUMSTEPH

WRITTEN BY OLIVIA : SIMPLY SENSORY BOXES

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