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Stranger danger is a phrase that we’re all familiar with, and we’ll probably all remember being taught all about it as children ourselves. But when it comes to the practicality of sitting down with your own children, it’s a whole different, daunting kettle of fish.
We’ve called on the advice of Rachel FitzD, parenting expert from NickWatch, the new connected smartwatch for kids. Having worked with parents, babies and children for more than 40 years, Rachel is passionate about encouraging and helping parents to gain the knowledge, insights and practical skills they need to become confident, competent and compassionate parents. She shares her top tips for keeping children safe while out and about.
Statistics tell us that children are safer in the world than ever before, but stats make little difference when our parental instinct yells at us to watch over our children every second.
So, lower your anxiety and build your child’s confidence, competence and safety as they begin to venture out of your parental gaze by following these top tips.
Talk about Stranger Danger
Starting to talk about stranger danger young enables a gradual, growing confidence and ability to assess and manage risks. Model good behaviour by chatting naturally about the steps you take to stay aware and safe: “That alley gives us the quickest route home but we can’t be seen down there. Let’s go the safer way past the shops where there are lots of people.” As your child becomes older, conversations will take their natural course and you will feel able to explore how “most strangers want to help us, but a few want to hurt us and it isn’t always easy to tell which is which”.
Always just answer the question in front of you – giving too much information too soon can overwhelm and confuse a young child. Once they have processed the answer you have given them, they will ask for more information and you can gradually open up the subject at a pace they can deal with. This gentle, child-led approach reduces the chance that your child will either know too little too late or too much too soon.
The ability of little ones to assess and manage risk grows with age and we can ensure they are at the top of that developmental curve by supporting them to develop strategies. Here are some top tips:
Make sure your child knows their address and your phone numbers off by heart
Even young children can learn their address and phone number – important if they ever get lost and someone finds them and needs to call you. Those who have trouble remembering can have the details written down and tucked somewhere safe, making sure they know where it is.
Help them to get to know their neighbourhood
Knowing the neighbourhood can help when children need to find safety or get home quickly, so talk as you walk around your neighbourhood together, pointing out their friends’ houses, the local shops, parks, bus routes and so on. When out for a drive, ask them to direct you home – four and five year olds should be able to tell you when to ‘turn now!’ as you get close and older children will be able to spot a wrong turn and re-direct you.
Discuss the difference between ‘GOOD’ and ‘BAD’ strangers
Model making good choices by talking out loud: “I’m not sure which is our bus stop but there’s a cafe so let’s go inside and ask the person behind the till.” Shop assistants, women with children, police officers and groups of children near their own age are generally better choices than single adults on their own. Finding help in public places is smarter than choosing somewhere they are unlikely to be seen, and encourage them to learn to trust their own instincts – if they feel something or someone is strange or a bit ‘off’ then they should get away and look for help as fast as possible.
Support kids to become confident talking to strangers
Teaching children to ‘never talk to strangers’ simply doesn’t keep them safe. It is much more useful for children to learn how to seek help when they need it and you aren’t around by supporting them from a young age to become confident at handing over payment for their own sandwich in a cafe, asking another mum to tie their shoe laces for them in the park, and taking responsibility for telling the doctor themselves ‘where it hurts’.
Discuss the difference between ‘GOOD’ and ‘BAD’ strangers
Model making good choices by talking out loud: “I’m not sure which is our bus stop but there’s a cafe so let’s go inside and ask the person behind the till.” Shop assistants, women with children, police officers and groups of children near their own age are generally better choices than single adults on their own. Finding help in public places is smarter than choosing somewhere they are unlikely to be seen, and encourage them to learn to trust their own instincts – if they feel something or someone is strange or a bit ‘off’ then they should get away and look for help as fast as possible. Having a code word for school pick-ups can help children to distinguish who is and isn’t safe to travel home with. Let your child choose the word and remind them that, if anyone else ever asks them to go with them and DOESN’T know the code word then it is fine for them to run away shouting as loudly as they can.
The NickWatch is a new connected smartwatch for children aged 6-9, with built-in GPS tracking enabling parents to know where their child is at all times. Available to purchase now for £79.95 on www.nickwatch.com with the linked Caretaker App downloadable on all App stores (from as little as £6.25 per month for a 2-year subscription).
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