As a mom, you want your child to grow up to be independent and curious. These are two of the most important traits a person can have. Luckily, there are many things you can do to help your child develop these qualities. This blog post will discuss some of the best ways to help your child grow more independent and curious. Keep reading for helpful tips!
We’ve heard that the Easter bunny is on his way to a town near you – check out the below for some ideas on what to do these Easter Holidays!
How often do you get to spend the day playing tourist in your own city? After some world travel, we returned home played tourist for the day with a day out in Glasgow.
One of our favourite things about the festive period is the Christmas markets & they are all starting in the next week or so (if they haven’t already)! Is there anything better than getting wrapped up, eating lots of delicious food & shopping with lots of small businesses? We have put together a list of the best UK Christmas markets so hopefully there is one local to you on this list for you to check out. We’ve also included the dates they are running AND their exact locations to make it easier for you.
Make sure to follow us on Instagram where we will be sharing our Christmas market visits!
MANCHESTER – 12TH NOVEMBER 2021 TO 22ND DECEMBER 2021
š – MANCHESTER CITY CENTRE
YORK – 18TH NOVEMBER 2021 TO 23RD DECEMBER 2021
š – St Sampsons Square YO1 8QT
BIRMINGHAM – 4TH NOVEMBER 2021 TO 23RD DECEMBER 2021
š Victoria Square and New Street
GLASGOW – 6TH NOVEMBER 2021 TO 23RD DECEMBER 2021
š St Enoch Square
EDINBURGH – 19TH NOVEMBER 2021 TO 2ND JANUARY 2022
šThe West Princes Street Gardens, The George Street event & East Princes Street Gardens
WINCHESTER – 19TH NOVEMBER 2021 TO 22ND DECEMBER 2021
š Winchester Cathedral SO23 9LS
NOTTINGHAM – 4TH DECEMBER 2021 TO 24TH DECEMBER 2021
š Old Market Square & Trinity Square
CHESTER – 18TH NOVEMBER 2021 TO 22ND DECEMBER 2021
š Town Hall CH1 2HQ
NEWCASTLE – 29TH NOVEMBER 2021 TO 26TH DECEMBER 2021
š Greyās Monument
Are you planning to visit any Christmas markets this year? Which is your favourite?
Autumn is well underway and we are here to share 20 things you can do in October. We have Halloween parties, hashtag challenges & various expeditions that everyone can enjoy. Take a look and see if there are any in your local area.
September is here! And this means that not only is autumn fast approaching, and kids are back to school, but it is also the month when you are invited to discover local history and culture at Heritage Open Days 2021!
On 10-19 September loads of different places will open their doors for the public as part of one of the biggest festivals of the year, all to celebrate culture and history. After the year we have had with lockdowns and being stuck at home it will feel even more exciting exploring new places. And what better way to do so then during a few fun filled days of events.
And do you know what the best part of it all is? It is all for free!Ā
It is an event that was established back in 1994 after a European initiative to raise appreciation for the diverse and rich culture of Europe. And up to 50 of the European states have signed on to have their own Heritage Open Days.
With every year the UK festival has grown in size and it has gone from around 700 events in its first year to over 5,500 currently. There are so many different events that there is bound to be one for every taste. I had personally never heard of it before but after having researched it a little I truly think it sounds like such an amazing thing.Ā
Like I said, there should be something for everyone as there is everything from guided tours around city centres, to walks in gorgeous nature. There are events for adults, and events more aimed at children. There are events involving food and others involving cute little furry animals. So, believe me when I say, that there should be something for everyone.Ā
There are so many beautiful places around the United Kingdom just waiting to be discovered. For a full list please visit Heritage Open Days own website. They have a map over the UK, with all the thousands of events, from far up north all the way down to the south, marked out. There are truly so many events, it would be impossible for me to even mention half of them. I did however have a little look and picked out a little taster of what kind of events there are.
First out is Bletchley Park, close to Milton Keynes and once the home of some of WW2ās greatest heroes. It was here that the World War Two Codebreakers were based, and it was also here that the modern computing was born.
So why not pay them a visit and explore this historically exciting place with the WW2 Codebreaking Huts and beautiful surroundings.
Bletchley Park, Sherwood Drive, Bletchley, Milton Keynes, Buckinghamshire, MK3 6EB
The Salvation Army, Hadleigh Training Centre, Castle Lane, Benfleet, Essex, SS7 2AP
The next place on my list a somewhere quite close to us. We are yet to visit but it looks like a great day out. There is 900 acres of farmland to roam around. It was bought by the Salvation Army 130 years ago and the Hadleigh Farm was originally created to help marginalized and unemployed people in society.
It is still a fully functioning farm that produces malt for Malteasers and wheat for Hovis bread. And it continues to help the weaker in society.
If you plan to visit there is lots to do! There is a tearoom to sit down and relax in, original farmhouses to explore, and stunning views.Ā There is also a Rare Breed Centre for the little ones, which includes ponies, pigs, poultry and different breeds of goats.Ā
Dover Priory Railway Station, Priory Station Approach, Dover, Kent, CT17 9SB
Dover is famous for its White Cliffs, but now you can go for a guided walk to discover more of what Dover has got to offer.
Put your walking boots on and pack a backpack with provisions, because this is a walk cross-county and there are a few steep hills.Ā
There will be beautiful Sea views (on good days you may see all the way to the French Coast), you get to learn about edible plants and you can view a historic Fortress.
The Old School, Old Wolverton Road, Old Wolverton, Milton Keynes, Buckinghamshire, MK12 5NH
I mean is there anything more magical then sitting under a sky full of stars? As a child I used to love to stop and look up at the dark sky with all these stars twinkling back at me. Now as an adult I live in a far too populated place to be able to see the stars properly.Ā
So to me this even sounds absolutely amazing! You get to gather around a fire, listen to stories, all while looking at the stars. Does that not sound like the cosiest night out ever?
There will be warm drinks and food available and the moon should be almost full harvest moon. I mean, count me in!!!
9 Jesus Lane, Cambridge, Cambridgeshire, CB5 8BA
Anyone a chocolate fan like me? Then you should go and discover how George Cadburyās decided to use his chocolate factory to help transform the lives of factory workers. There will be a workshop for children where they will learn the story of Mr Cadbury.
Whatās not to love? Storytelling, craft and chocolate all at the same event!
Stephenson Railway Museum, Middle Engine Lane, North Shields, Tyne & Wear, NE29 8DX
Are you a lover of trains? Or maybe you got a child that is? Why not go visit the Stephenson Railway Museum and take a trip along the route of the old coal trains, in a 1950s passenger carriage.Ā
In addition to the train ride there is obviously also the museum to visit, with a range of different locomotives on display. One of them being a locomotive called Billy that was built around 1816. How cool is that?
Tavistock Visitor Information Centre, Court Gate, Bedford Square, Tavistock, Devon, PL19 0AE
Ever hear of a heritage stamp trail? Well Tavistock Subscription Library has created on around the historic town center. From 11 September it is open for children of all ages to join in. They get a heritage passport to collect their stamps in.Ā There will be clues around the town on different buildings and at each location they can collect their stamps. When all stamps are collected, they will be given a certificate to show off! Which Iām sure most kids will enjoy, mine would!
The Tasting Garden, The Storey Gardens, Meeting House Lane, Lancaster, Lancashire, LA1 1TH
How amazing does it sound with a Tasting Garden?? A garden full of a variety of apples, pears, plums and cherries, all there for you to taste. In this very garden there are 21 fruit trees to find along the paths.Ā
If you tire of apples and pears there are also herbs to look out for and lots of different insects to look out for.Ā
The Italian Gardens, 8-10 South Parade, Weston-Super-Mare, Somerset, BS23 IJN
In the Italian Gardens they have something called the Whirligig! It is an event they themselves describes as an āextravaganza of free fun!ā And it is all bee-themed.Ā Ā
It is all a celebration with outdoors events, and even a multi-sensory art instillation called Artizaniās Bees where you can walk amongst different types of bee hives.Ā
Ashcombe carpark, Simonsbath, Minehead, Somerset, TA24 7SH
In Somerset I found another little gem, the White Rock Cottage and Ashcombe Gardens. It is a gorgeous place with a cottage and a garden landscape dating back to the Knight family that lived that in the 1820s.Ā
The White Rock Cottage was recently conserved together with an old Victorian school room that is also there to view. They both sound really interesting and Iām sure both adults and children would enjoy a look around. But what really caught my attention was the beautiful woodlands surrounding the cottage. I would love to take a stroll through there and breathing in the fresh air.Ā
Zoological Drive, Discovery Way, Dudley, West Midlands, DY1 4AL
I mean have you ever heard of a better combination then a Zoo and a Castle?
Well at Dudley Zoo you would get just that. There are hundreds of exotic animals on a wooded hillside, with a caste just smack bang in the middle of it!Ā
My children would definitely love a day out at this Zoo!!Ā
September is well underway, although the heat wave we had over the past few days was very unexpected and I for one am glad it is (hopefully) over. We have put together a list of different ideas & events taking place over the month of September, all over the country. Ranging from pumpkin picking to garden shows – there is something for everyone. Let us know your September plans!
14 Calling all mini rock nā roll-ers! Born to Be Wild Child, known for their family rock and roll parties are branching out with an event in Belgrave Hall, Leeds on the 25th September. Thereās a rock star fancy dress competition, themed arts and crafts, balloon drop, face painting and of course the best DJās in town.
Before COVID hit, we had planned and booked to go to BeWilderwood Original site in Norfolk as we loved the idea and the look of it. But then we had to cancel and a year later they opened a site in Cheshire which is much closer to us, safe to say we were really excited! BeWILDerwood Cheshire Adventure Park is the perfect family day out, it is based on the magical adventures of the books written by Tom Blofield, we havenāt actually read the books but we will definitely be buying them after our visit!
Tickets are based on height so that the littlest amongst the family or the “Born to be Wild’s” are free and the taller you are (the more you can go on) the higher the price. Although we were given these tickets for free, we have already booked again to go and paid Ā£78 total for us as we all fell under the tallest height bracket of 105cm and taller.
BeWilderwood is located in Whitchurch, Cheshire. It was about an hour drive from us in Manchester. Children and children at heart really are meant for here, every detail is just planned so that there is wonder wherever you turn. We saw children of all ages (grown up children too) enjoying all the different activities and truly enjoying themselves.
The whole experience was brilliant, the wood is basically a giant circle so you can easily get around and pick and mix the areas you want to visit and in whatever order you want. We started with the Treacherous Trail, a wonderful walkway with gorgeous purple flowers and hidden treasures for you to discover! We headed over to Telescope tower to climb our way to the top, the views really are breath-taking, and same with the Broken Bridge, and the views from the top were gorgeous. We spent some time on the Slippery Slopes where the kids (and Graham) really had a blast going down the big slides.
We got lost in the Mish Mash Maze and wandered around for ages trying to figure out the way back out but it was so much fun, each picking a direction and seeing if we were right or (mostly) wrong! We also loved the sky maze, and the wobbly wires were so much fun. We love a good zip line in our house and the fact we could go side by side was brilliant, I also noticed a zip wire made for younger children too which I think is a brilliant idea so they donāt miss out. We created Dens together, checked out Boggle Village and BeWilderville and walked around the marshy moss.
We decided to stop and get something to eat at the Cosy Cabin, it was really busy but the BeWilder Banger was lovely and the kids munch boxes were brilliant. We caught the end of one of the Storytime Shows and it looked like so much fun, we didnāt catch the whole thing but when we go back we will make sure we catch one.
BeWilderwood caters for everything you need really but here are some helpful hints for our next visit or your first one:
– Wear sensible shoes! Something you can climb in but wonāt get wet if there are puddles (or just jump in them and enjoy the fun even more).
The kids really enjoyed themselves, exploring and climbing and working their way through the obstacles. It really is a full day out, I think we were there from around 10:30 and we left around 2:30 so a good 4 hours. We could have stayed longer too to catch the Story time or the crafts in the Big Hat but we had Alice’s party to sort out the day after!
~ The Experience: 5/5
As always the kids pick the experience score so itās a win from us! Check out BeWilderwood’s website here to get tickets.
*This post is a PR trip on behalf of That Mama Club, I was offered free tickets to attend and asked for content in the shape of Instagram stories, photos and a blog post. All observations and opinions are my own.
It’s Almost June, which means #30dayswild is back! #30dayswild was set up by The Wildlife Trust to encourage young people to get out in nature. It’s where you to do one wild thing a day throughout the whole month: for your health, well being and for the planet. The Wildlife Trust provide packs and materials and youĀ can still sign up and join in, itās completely free! Once signed up, you will be able to download and print and abundance of material and things to do throughout the month of June.
Here at TMC, we wanted to encourage you guys to join in with #30dayswild -So we have decided to ditch the normal # challenge for the month of June and create #TMC30dayswild challenge!!
Below, we have listed over 100 things/activities/outings for you to do – they are all nature based. They are split into groups, with each activity worth either 5 10 15 20 25 and a whopping 50 points depending on the group they are in.
The idea, is that if you would like to join in – please let us know. We will then create teams by a name picker or out of a hat via Instagram live. Then, throughout the month of June, you and your team pick and choose different activities from the list to do. You post on your socials – either stories, or a grid post – tagging us at @thatmamaclub, as well as your team mates and using #TMC30dayswild – then they are all in one place.
We will then keep a tally of our teams scores, either in the form of whatsapp/instagram team chats. Then, at the end of each week – we will see who’s in the lead..making it a bit of fun! Then, at the end of the month, we will see which team has won overall.
It’s all a bit of fun, encouraging us to get outside more! Please see the list of activities below…
Egg Box colour hunt
Scavenger hunt
Tree markings
Nature based water play
Mud painting
Rock painting
Have a picnic
Play in the rain
Draw round shadows
Do some bird watching
Walk through the woods
Look for snails after it rains
Have breakfast outside
Read a book outside
Listen to birdsong
Paint pinecones
Leaf threading
Fly a kite
Rock balancing
Nature cutting tray
Make a nature crown
Nature paint brushes
Nature bracelets
Bird feeders
Mix and match pebbles
Do some gardening
Leaf painting
Make a nature colour wheel
Look for mini-beasts
Build a den outdoors
Make a bee water station
Jump in muddy puddles
Nature sensory basket/bottles
Watch the sunset/sunrise
Do wildlife yoga outside!
Make your own binoculars
Watch a wild webcam
Climb a tree
Look for animal prints
Read nature based books
Make a bug hotel
Stay up late to look at the stars
Make some mud pies!
Make a daisy chain
Camp in the back garden
Make a sundial
Cook outside
Make a sun print
Pond dipping
Make shapes out of nature
Make a fairy garden
Brew some petal potion!
Go on a leaf hunt
Forest bathing
Pick a wild bouquet
Eat something youāve grown
Grow sunflowers
Make faces out of nature
Set up a mud kitchen
Make Nature scented playdough
Water painting
Have a teddy bears picnic
Flower pressing
Go foraging
Make a rain gauge
Create nature masks
Nature bingo
Create a nature collage
Make a flower sun-catcher
Make flower pots out of tin cans
Create a stick wind chime
Make a stick fairy
Go on a flower hunt
Pick elderberries
Play Pooh sticks
Build a stick maze
Keep a Nature journal
Flower ice water play
Dye cloth using nature
Make tea from flowers
Nature wings
Clay nature print ornaments
Homemade water colours
Wild weaving
Nature mobiles
Photographing wildlife
Nature wands
Make some nature mandalas
Wild flower bombs
Nature based playdough
Making a hedgehog out of clay and sticks
Find some elderflower
Make dandelion cookies
Create a butterfly table
Make a birds nest
Look at the clouds
Feed the ducks at a local pond (try getting bird seed instead of bread)
Create chalk art outside
Have a plastic free day
Celebrate Summer Solstice on June 21st!
Beach Clean up
Littler Picking
Good luck! We can’t wait to see what you guys come up with for TMC #30dayswild challenge!
āYou must be mad, travelling with a toddler!ā
We canāt argue with that, but we travel not to escape life, but for life not to escape us. Every year we choose to travel with our daughter Florence, who is currently 3 and it truly brings us together like nothing else. All family holidays are special, but when you hit the road for the best part of a month you really get to know each other, for better or worse and create some truly unforgettable memories.Ā
Just to give you an idea, this is what our 2020 travel itinerary looked like: Verona, Salzburg, Lake Bled, Chianti, Amalfi Coast, Tropea, Palermo and all the spots in between in 25 days:
āIād love to plan something like this but wouldnāt know where to start!ā
Want to know the secret to planning this type of trip? Blagging it! The plan normally begins with a place or area that weād like to visit, then we look on Google Maps and find that thereās somewhere beautiful only a few hours away. This tends to escalate quickly into a huge road trip that barely feels possible but fills us with excitement. So rather than overwhelming ourselves, we book our flights to create a start and end point and then the fun can begin with booking accommodation and transport along the way.
āBut how do you book all of your hotels?ā
We are massive Airbnb fans and very rarely stay in hotels. We love the flexibility, freedom and home comforts of having our own space, especially with a child. You can really make the space your own, whilst enjoying a more authentic experience in your destination. A few of our favourite memories for our Airbnbās include picking fresh fruit and veg from the farm in Tropea, playing guitar and drinking homemade Galliano with a 10th generation local in Sorrento and accidentally booking accommodation in Florence with no wi-fi or TV (so peaceful). At the very least, you get the chance to speak to a host who can tell you the best places to eat and how to get around.Ā
Ā āBut how do you afford it, it must cost a fortune?ā
Our first holiday was travelling around Italy for 15 days, Florence was 5 months old and I was still on maternity therefore our budget was set at Ā£1,500. Our most recent and longest trip of 25 days budget was Ā£2,500. We always set limits on our accommodation of 50 pounds a night and work off that. The joy of being in charge of your own flights, accommodation and car hiring/ transportation needs is that it can cost you as much or as little as you want.
āI couldnāt think of anything worse than travelling with a child!āĀ
We took our first travel holiday when Florence was 5 months old and in hindsight, this was probably the easiest holiday weāve had. She napped on the food tray on the train, breast fed on gondolas in Venice, we even came on a wine tour in Chianti and she was the best behaved out of all the attendees. At this age, your baby is going to cry whether youāre at home or on holiday, so you might as well be somewhere beautiful. Some aspects change as they grow and you must adjust your itinerary accordingly, but you also get a lot more enjoyment from seeing them take in the experiences that you are introducing them to. We donāt feel that weāve had to give anything up, you just have to make thing more exciting in the eyes of a 3-year-old. For example; Want to enjoy a morning looking at beautiful architecture? No, youāre looking for Disney Princess Castles. Fancy an afternoon enjoying a cocktail on the square? Let them have an ice cream or a fancy drink from the bar. Want to enjoy an evening meal as a couple? Not going to happen, but who needs romance when youāve got a toddler playing hide and seek under the tables of the restaurant and getting everyone involved. Finally, itās important to just slow down the pace and enjoy seeing things through their eyes
āIs it always smooth sailing because thatās how it looks on social media?ā
No, of course not. In fact, hereās a few examples of when things have gone wrong:
Day 1 of our first ever family holiday, we were in Venice so took Florence around in her sling all day as the pram wasnāt an option. When we got back to our accommodation we realised that she had an awful heat rash and she cried all night. That was certainly a āwhat the hell are we doingā moment.
Florence threw up all over her car seat, and we donāt mean one of those cute baby sick, the car seat was ruined! Luckily, we were on the way to the airport and managed to get there and get home. The car seat ended up in a skip at the side of the road.
Whilst we were checking into our accommodation, Florence wandered into the house for a look around. Little did we know that she had found a Birdseye chilli plant in the bedroom and decided that the little red things looked tasty! This resulted in us googling āCan my toddler get sick from eating a chilli?ā which returned a headline story about a toddler dying from eating a chilli in India. Anyway, after a few gallons of milk and a few cold yoghurts, she was fine.
Letās add to the list getting stung by a jellyfish, stung by a wasp, pooping at the side of the road, you get the idea! I promise weāre not neglectful parents and these things always feel worse than they actually are, and we genuinely believe these things help to make memories, youāve got to have a few negatives in there so that you can appreciate the positives.
With things up in the air due to the Covid-19 pandemic, we donāt know when weāre going to be able to travel again, but when youāre allowed to travel again, why not consider a real adventure to blow away those cobwebs weāve gathered over the last 12 months?
Flying with children at any age is no mean feat. Gone are the days of just settling down on the plane, choosing your films and having a little snooze. Nowadays, travelling with kids may be less relaxed but it doesnāt mean that it has to be really stressful and no fun – promise! My family are lucky enough to have travelled many times already with kids during the baby, toddler and young child stage. This has been both solo, and all together, so below I have included some things that we have found useful on our travels. Hopefully, when we can all travel safely again, these tips will be helpful for you too!
Here are a few more specific tips for the different stages:
Finally, flying with children of any age can be both hard and fun so try not to worry about it too much in advance – we found preparation helps and then you just have to go with it – delays happen, kids can have meltdowns or be fantastic, you just never know. At the end of the day as long as you all get to your destination without any Home Alone style disasters it is a huge win!Ā You may just need a huge glass of wine, a workout or relaxing shower once the kids are asleep.
We have the gorgeous Roshni sharing all about why 2021 is going to be the year of staycations and giving you a sneak peek into her STUNNING Dorset holiday home, that can be rented out on Air B&B.
Well hasnāt it been one heck of a year!? I remember this time last year we announced we were going to become a family of 4, we were over the moon (although very sick) and full of excitement spreading the news. I immediately jumped on the āletās go on holiday before the baby gets hereā bandwagon as letās face it, as magical as it is, it is so much hassle going on holiday with little ones; the luggage, nap times vs. taxi/flight times, the battle of getting them to eat dinner at the dinner table in a restaurant every night, it almost doesnāt feel like a holiday at times as itās so much work.Ā
So, we started looking and Italy was first on the cards, weāve been so many times but thereās always somewhere new and beautiful to discover and the food I think youāll agree, simply DIVINE! I donāt know about you but when I was pregnant it was all about the carbs (and desserts!!). But then suddenly, we went from shouting from the rooftops about the pregnancy, looking at holidays, to then being classed as vulnerable, being sent to work from home indefinitely and then a nationwide lockdown- a huge turn of events. One way or another, everyoneās lives had changed and here we are, one year later, still in lockdown.Ā
We did manage to squeeze in a glorious summer though, how did you spend summer 2020? A lot of the UK flocked down here to the South Coast; I know this because in July we had just launched our very own Airbnb; Poole Retreat on the Green. Literally as lockdown was lifted and hospitality could resume, we thought it was all terrible timing with everything going on, but it worked out perfectly and we were fully booked. We gained 5-star reviews from all our guests making me an Airbnb Super Host! I can tell you it was a busy whirlwind of a summer.Ā
Going back to the first lockdown we did a full renovation of the property which is a detached house in Poole Dorset. The house is split into two flats, we started with upstairs whilst the mortgage was finalising on downstairs. Right from the very beginning I wanted it to be a home away from home, all the things we look for when going away as a couple and a family. Rewinding even more, we moved to Dorset in 2018, 2 weeks before I had my first baby, crazy and against all health advice given to pregnant women, I know! It was not easy, especially with my mental health being up and down, but the healing ocean made it the best decision yet. With all that in mind, I wanted to create a space for people to come and feel the connection I feel with the coast and the outdoors, somewhere to escape from the everyday rush, explore the surrounding beauty and recharge.Ā
Here at Poole Retreat on the Green we’ve gone for a ‘Scandi’ meets ‘Boho’ interior. The aesthetic opposites work beautifully in this space, giving a laid-back luxe vibe. A single, central walkway connects all the spaces; kitchen, bathroom, king size master bedroom, small double bedroom & living/dining area. With large windows across the front of the property, views of the green open space and glimmering blue of the sea in the distance, fills the space with light all day. We are moments away from the beautiful beaches along the Jurassic Coast, gorgeous coffee shops, endless walks in ā¦ you choose ā¦ the woods, forests, clifftops, sandy shores, you are literally spoilt for choice. It is simply the perfect getawayā¦ at home, in England.Ā
I do love a good Airbnb, UK or abroad, that is what we have used for years. I always look for pretty interiors with hosts that have outstanding reviews. It can be daunting booking on Airbnb for the first time, there is so much on there, but using the right filters and reading the reviews always helps with the booking process. To be honest I find it better than hotels, here are some of my pros:
So what are we going to do this summer? Right now, thereās a sense of fear of the unknown given the current situation and not knowing where we will be in a couple of months. With COVID rates, vaccine effects, what we will and will not be allowed to do, weāve seen things change so drastically how are we meant to plan summer 2021? Even if we can travel again, will we want to? It is becoming apparent staycations are the next best thing to getting away. Thereās less risk of financial loss due to no added costs of; flights, transfers, hotels, insurance etc and most places in the UK are doing 100% refundable cancellations. With all the travel restrictions in place, time and effort lost to isolation on either side of travelling, staying put sounds like a holiday on its own! But is that such a bad thing?Ā
There is so much beauty and positives for exploring right here at home in the UK;
It sounds like itās going to be the best summer yet, the year we can finally connect with our loved ones again ā Summer 2021 ā the year of staycations.
BY CAROLA (GUEST WRITER)
How long has it been since youāve seen your parents, your in-laws or spent some quality time with your extended family?Ā Conversations with my friends usually circle back to the usual topics at this moment in time – home schooling and working from home but also how our families are doing.Ā Most of my friends still see their parents or in-laws regularly, having either formed a bubble with them to help out with childcare or running errands for them, scheduling socially-distanced visits on a weekly basis.Ā
As an expat living in the UK, not seeing my family and my mother is something of a norm for me.Ā In a normal year, I probably see them once, or twice when we visit during the school holidays, and we phone each other regularly or use modern technology to overcome the obstacles of hundreds of miles between us.Ā Family to me are my people – they are the silent but steady force behind me, a stronghold that lets me get on with life, but is quietly in the background, always ready to talk, to laugh, to cry, to share and give advice.Ā I am fully aware that not everyone has a good relationship with their family and I am very lucky with mine.Ā It doesnāt mean we always see eye to eye, but they are unconditionally supportive of me and my little family unit.Ā And that is utterly priceless.Ā Ā
Whilst my wonderful bond with my family is a shining beacon of light in my world, it also means that I miss them terribly and especially since becoming a mother myself, I often feel pangs of homesickness and a longing to have them close by, that is the reality of expat life.Ā I canāt ring my mum and ask her to give me a hand with the kids when I am feeling totally overwhelmed.Ā I am unable to take advantage of brothers, cousins, aunts and, worst of all, I feel unable to voice those feelings of loneliness to people around me.Ā Ā
āSurely, you knew what you were getting yourself into when you moved to a different country!ā, āJust face-time them!ā, āThe flightās not that long!ā, āJust move back!āĀ
Those are just some of the comments Iāve heard since beginning my expat life and, although some of them mean well, they arenāt the solution to occasional desperate longings for my family support.Ā Before Covid, when my mother visited and stayed for weeks, I indulged in blissful moments of watching her with her grandchildren, but also enjoyed a few more moments to myself, knowing my kids were looked after and safe whilst I took an extra five minutes in the shower, cooked without having to play referee in yet another sibling argument or, the biggest luxury of all, went for a quick walk around the block with my partner. Just the two of us.Ā I donāt want someone to have my children for weekends or weeks so I can disappear.Ā Itās those small moments of support in everyday life I crave and need.Ā
I speak to one of my friends who is Brazilian and had to cancel her flights home last Christmas.Ā Her Fernweh* is on par with mine, albeit the journey she faces home is in itself a bit of an odyssey.Ā Like me, she terribly misses her family and Covid has made her life a misery in more than one way.Ā A constant sunseeker and serial globe trotter, my friend, a single mum of one, lives for travel and yearns for the help of her parents with her son.Ā āMy parents miss us and I miss them.Ā Having help with a young child from parents is invaluable and I donāt have that here.Ā Now I canāt even go back home to spend a few weeks with them.āĀ Ā
Another friend of mine, mother of two under 5s, had to cancel journeys abroad to see her family numerous times, too.Ā Ā
āI have resigned to the fact that weāll just be communicating through facetime for now.Ā Who knows when the borders open again, and when it is safe to travel.Ā I am grateful everyone is safe and well, but it doesnāt make it easier.Ā I miss seeing my family, I miss being back home, I am so upset my parents are missing out on seeing their grandchildren even more so now than ever before.ā
Expat mums donāt need sympathy or pity – we know we made a choice and know to live our lives in gratitude for modern technology, the invention of aeroplanes and the gift of travelling and living wherever we want to.Ā However, especially in times like this, the fact of not having our immediate families around is amplified and we are desperately waiting for the times we can see our loved ones again and hold them, watch our children spend time with their grandparents and hang out with our siblings and their brood.Ā Ā
Weāre made of strong stuff, and we adore the friends that have become our family wherever we are.Ā Donāt hold it against us that sometimes, we just need and want our own tribe and experience a bit of Heimweh**.
* Fernweh –Ā German untranslatable expression for a longing to travel and to be somewhere else
**Heimweh – German for homesickness
We hope you enjoyed Carola’s guest post on expat life!
Carola is a writer, content and copywriter and published author.Ā When she isnāt posing in high heels and leopard print for Instagram, she is writing poems, short stories and articles. You can find her on Instagram, Facebook or Twitter @chameleoninhighheels , or on her blog page www.chameleoninhighheels.com
