How To Keep Sex Fun After Having Children

 

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Sex can seem like a chore at the best of times, so throw in having children and it all goes out the window. Especially when you have young children and you have to decide whether you’d rather have an orgasm or an extra 10 minutes sleep.. i’m not gonna lie – sleep always won. I think I can count on one hand the amount of times me & my partner had sex in the 12 months following our first son’s birth. However since having our second child (he is 17 months old now for context), my libido is BACK and we are having sex again. More sex than we’ve had in a long time. We thought we would share our top tips on how to keep sex fun after having children.

TAKE YOUR TIME

You don’t want to rush in all guns blazing with a giant tentacle shaped butt plug wedged between your cheeks. Slow & steady wins the race. Ease yourself in. Don’t feel like you have to release your inner porn star (although if you do, HELL YEAH…). Please let’s also remember, just because you might be cleared for sex at your six week postnatal check (WHO IN THE FRESH HELL IS READY AT SIX WEEKS?!) that does NOT mean you have to do it. You don’t owe anyone anything.

NURTURE YOUR EMOTIONAL & EMOTIONAL NEEDS

We all know it’s hard to relax and let go when we have 20,000 things running through our mind. Think, what do you need to do for yourself to feel good? – it could be ranting to a friend about something you’ve been annoyed about, it could be taking a long bath, it could be enjoying a cheeky little pre-coital wank (wink..). Practicing self care as a couple is equally as important; whether it’s asking a family member to babysit whilst you for a date night or ordering a takeaway and watching a film once the kids are in bed.

THINK ABOUT WHAT TURNS YOU ON

Not your partner. YOU. What are you into? Communicate that with your partner! Just the conversation itself can be HOTTTT.

INTRODUCE SEX TOYS

The tentacle shaped butt plug I mentioned previously? that’s a real toy but i’m not trying to scare you. We have a few to share that are fun! A 10 Day Love Challenge Couple’s Box is filled to the brim with exciting sex toys and erotic accessories that will spice up your sex life and bring pleasure to you both. If toys aren’t your thing (they really aren’t for everyone!), then how about a sexy little version of Monopoly. The Monogamy Erotic Board Game features three levels of intensity for personalised play: intimate, passionate and steamy. It reaches its climax with the winner choosing one of the 50 fantasies to act out. Some of the cards have a “Treat” action that you carry out over in the days and weeks to come..

Okay, for those who fancy trying something a little more… butt appreciation.. we have the kit for you! This Anal kit for beginners contains everything you need. It contains everything you need to relax and open up to new pleasurable sensations – including step-by-step instructions.

MAKE SMALL GESTURES

You don’t have to plan big extravagant weekends away and luxurious spa breaks. Small gestures daily can really make all the difference; having a kiss at the end of every day, sending a sexy text message, your partner managing to unpair their crusty socks before they put them in the wash…

There are so many different things you can do to keep things fun and sinful 😉 What is something you have done with your partner to light the spark again?

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4 Comments

  1. June 15, 2021 / 6:22 pm

    So relatable!.. And I wish I read this when we first had our daughter. I’m all for small gestures during the day, like a build up to the main event! I still struggle to get myself in the right frame of mind though sometimes, my mind usually runs 100mph so sex can often be at the bottom of my to do list.

    Claire.x
    http://www.clairemac.co.uk

    • admin
      Author
      June 15, 2021 / 6:40 pm

      Absolutely this YES! We have so much we are trying to juggle and remember – that sex is definitely one of my lowest priorities LOL. x

  2. Josie
    June 15, 2021 / 8:24 pm

    This is such a good read! I went completely off sex after having my first child and it definitely felt like a chore. Especially since his sex drive was just like normal and mine had gone completely out the window. I can honestly say that for that first year I mostly had sex for his sake. I mean I enjoyed it during the act, but most nights I would have happily just slept instead 🙈

    We are on the right track now though but you are so right with all these things you are listing!! Sometimes it takes time, but as long as you both try it will get there in the end.
    Maybe won’t be ordering an octopus buttplug anytime soon 😉😂 but that couples box sounds like such a great idea 😍

  3. June 16, 2021 / 10:07 am

    I love this!! There is such a stigma around sex when there shouldn’t be. Kids can interrupt sex life but there’s so many ways to bring back that flame. Great post!! Xx

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