WRITTEN BY DARSHANA (GUEST WRITER)
After having my first daughter I instantly felt judged and the shocking thing was that I felt most judged by other mothers. I always thought other mums would understand how I felt and what I was going through because they were on the same journey. Instead, I found mothers who were competing with one another to win the ‘best mum’ award and constantly justifying their decisions on how they parent their kids in front of others. I am here to share the mummy love & remind people why it is so important that we support each other, especially during such a difficult time.
Below are some of the questions/statements I had experienced after having my first daughter which I found extremely hurtful and made me feel like a terrible mum instantly.
I think it is so important for mums to lift each other up and be judgement free as they are going through the exact same journey. I believe everyone has their own way of parenting and no way is the wrong way, it might just not be my way. Its mind boggling how they are your children but the whole world has an opinion on how you should bring them up. It is difficult to have so many eyes judging you while you are figuring out your own path in this parenting journey.
I am really hard on myself and mega critical on what kind of mother I am, and I sometimes think I need to give myself a break but it always helps to have another mum giving me positive encouragement and not making comments about how my way is not the ‘right way’ – what is the right way when it comes to parenting? I do not think anyone has the answer to that. If you do, please share the secret!
I know there are also mums out there who believe in supporting and uplifting all mums because it is not as easy as it looks on the outside. Since becoming a mum I have taken an oath that I will never judge how differently a mum parents to me, but I will encourage and applaud them in doing what they are doing because only they know what is good for their baby and what works for them.
I want to end this by saying no mum is wrong or holds the title of being a ‘bad mum’. We are incredible and if we doubt it for a second, look at the smile on our children’s faces when they are with us and it will tell all.
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